


Dread

by Thesilentone



Category: Crisis Core: Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII
Genre: Court hearings, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Medical Trauma, Multi, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-29
Updated: 2015-12-07
Packaged: 2018-05-03 23:46:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 30
Words: 35,353
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5311640
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thesilentone/pseuds/Thesilentone
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When a standard operation goes wrong and results in death and injury, One young man and those with him will realise that you only need one word to describe everything that unfolds.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Dread.  
Hi. My name is holly and this rather depressing piece is my very first attempt at writing for these particular characters and this scenario, I'll be the first to admit that when I love a story, character ect. I always want to put them in peril, soo without ado here this goes. Fair warning, this story is in essence a love story involving our intrepid heroes so if you find same sex couples offensive then this is not for you and I sincerely apologise for any offence and or discomfort this may cause, though it won't be too graphic . Also if you care much for it or not I know where this is heading and how long it will take to get there so enjoy I guess? Comments and critique always welcome :) also self beta'd so sorry for any mistakes, also I'm from great Britain should it really matter so I have where possible used American terminology where I could but some words I think are from the uk so apologies if you don't understand, hit me up and I'll try and explain them!! 

Full disclaimer applies. I do not own final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters nor do I intend to profit from them . All rights belong to square Enix. 

Part 1  
Interesting how a word can bring everything and everyone to a standstill isn't? Just think about it for a moment, one minute you and those around you are carefree and enjoying whatever it is their doing, whether it's just chilling and watching the world go by on its axis while those that pass by are mingling and conversing with their fellow inhabitants and in that moment it hits you.

You know it will happen, you tell yourself that this is what we do, it's who we are. You can tell yourself this morning, noon and night, hell you can say it till the cows come home or until you're blue in the face. But in the end it doesn't really matter does it?

This is when common sense kicks in, it tells you maybe it isn't as bad as you're making it out in your imagination. That in that instance you're over active mind is going to the worse possible scenario and that really all it is just a rather unfortunate turn of events and that in the next few moments someone in the know will come up to you with an all knowing look on their face and say “hey buddy! Don't look like that it's really OK, sure it looks real bad but c'mon cheer up! It's fine, honestly ”. Yeah right. 

Then there's the partner of common sense, it's ugly sister, paranoia. This one you hate with a passion, no that's not a strong enough feeling for this, but again, right now what else is? If love keeps you grounded, keeps you secure and safe within yourself and those you're affiliated with, then the real question is what better way to describe this than hate itself? Right about now you're digressing and that's fine cos you really and I mean REALLY don't want to hear what paranoia wants to whisper in your ear, with her sweet, almost sickly tone telling you that maybe, just maybe your overactive mind does actually have a rather valid point. That may be it really is the worst case scenario your mind can come up with and oh yeah you remember that well connected guy don't ya? You know, the one with eyes and ears in literally every one's personal, professional and secret business, we'll he'll probably come to you with that all so familiar knowing look and just as he's about to tell you BANG! You flip, go postal on the poor fellow. You yell at the top of lungs, possibly higher “look I get it you know everything! See everything! Hear everything! But you don't know this so just back the hell up!!” and with that you end it before it even begins or worse, you lose a very good intelligence source as well as a good and loyal friend who just about keeps you and whatever is left of your soul grounded and sane.

But you see none of that really matters and you know why? Because you're not in public right now are you? No you're in the office or rather to be factual you're in angeal's office. You're watching the world go by on its axis and watching the people converse and so on and so forth. But here's the real kicker, all those thoughts you just had they're real aren't they? Sure they may see you as the not so sane one around here, I mean REALLY, who has conversations in their heads about how to label such mundane things as emotions and how they relate to all this crap!! I mean come on pal time to get that noggin of yours checked right?! 

And there you go again like a stuck record begging to be changed and to play something new now please, but that's ok Co's right about now angeal has finished his conversation with whoever and is so discreetly coming right behind you. That's when you notice THAT look, the only thing that tells you “yeah it's really that bad zack”. 

 

“zack, they just brought him back, now you need to prepare yourself and I MEAN it, this is official business time we're on and you need to show compartmentalisation ok? ”. 

“Ok. But be honest with me now angeal and I need this, how bad is he?”. You just about say his name without choking. “how's cloud?”

And there it is my friend that one ominous word that started all of this…… dread.

“it's really bad kid, it was a standard operation, you know? Run of the mill observe and confront should the situation call for it”. Here even the ever stoic angeal has to get a grip with himself. “However, things got dicey the moment one of cloud's fellow squad members mistook a wad of cash for a grenade and well, long story short, a fight ensued, bullets were exchanged and cloud took one. From what little I could hear from sephiroth over the helicopter's blades the bullet nicked an artery in his neck maybe the subclavian or the jugular they can't say which due to the lack of light and time but their eta is approximately 10 minutes out, we should know more soon”.

And there it is, dread.

With a look that can make a admiral proud zack turns away from angeal's worry, heads to the door, turns and says “well then shall we get a move on then”?

“Ok zack lead the way”.

 

TBC


	2. Dread Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time. It's all there is

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can I just say. Wow!!! Thanks to all that have seen this already. I've got at least a quarter of this written so I should post at least two a day. So thanks again. :)

Dread Part 2 

Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters, nor do I intend to profit from them . All rights belong to square Enix.  
So here we go the second chapter. To be honest I've had this in my head for at least a couple of months so I mainly have a general idea of how it goes from here on out.And to top this off this chapter contains references to war and injury and the medical area so please don't take it literally in what you should do in case of said injuries. Anyway on with the show!!

 

Here they are and boy on record time to boot as well, not to long after he was given a sitrep of the situation, zack followed by a war harden but nonetheless human angeal had reached the elevator that would take them to the trauma centre where cloud along with sephiroth would be taken.They both with rather creepy timing opted to take the steel trap of death rather than the cardio testing stairs to get them there for one reason and one reason only…. Time to think.

For Zack, it was a chance to think and REALLY think about the these horrible turn of events, everything was fine, perfect actually. He got up, did his usual routine, eg begging internally of course for more sleep and the world and the company to stop and chill for the day hell even for a week please!!! Only for a small but not so subtle chuckle in the doorway drawing zack's attention.

“morning Mr fair, as much as this is fun watching you argue with yourself and the evils that is the alarm clock and employment you really do need to get yourself in gear or were both screwed for various different reasons”. Cloud's very cheeky yet endearing words, despite your situation actually gets you more alert than anything.

“You know if you were standing there you could've of said something you know?” zack says in that tone that leaves no doubt that in reality he really didn't hear you come in, drowning in his self pity, so much for the so called famous SOLDIER enchantments huh?

“I could've…… but it's too much fun to watch you dread a routine you've been doing for years without fail zack!” cloud says practically laughing his damn fool head off.

“You know, I distinctly remember you hating mornings too and you were just as bad if not worse than me!!” typical zack, defending his childish actions by deflecting to an easy target… cloud!!

But still, for all their early banter here, toppled with this calm and serene air around them was comforting, despite this day and it's meaning.

“Come over here”. Zack says, almost coos the word's really but all the same cloud obeys obviously, in fact it's actually drilled into him. No it's more than that, it's an intense need that needs to be fulfilled so cloud wanders over, waiting for zack to sit up right….. Only for him to drag them both back down on the bed again.Really, what was wrong with zack and mornings when he he had an overabundance of energy that practically calls to be used?!!

“So, you ready to go and save the world and keep all its treasures and wonders ie me, angeal, seph and Genesis protected for many years to come?” zack says soothingly in cloud's ear.

“Actually yeah I am, well sort of. I've got the general ideal of the mission parameters and I know who I'm going with, all that's got me dreading this is a feeling that I can't shake. The feeling that maybe it might end badly you know?” cloud looks to zack with an a expression that's practically asking you to understand and not right this off as just nervous dribble and amazingly zack picks up on this, despite the sleep crawling from the abyss trying to reclaim him yet again.

“Ok first off don't mention the word dread or any of its affiliates got it?” zack punctuates with a flick to the forehead, followed rather nicely with an affectionate kiss…. If He did say so himself. “Secondly, I get it, we've all been there and yeah that's a reasonable and completely rational feeling to have, hell I'll be rather concerned I'd you didn't feel that way. But cloud your forgetting who's the overall commander in all this, despite you being the c.o of the group”. Zack says gazing down on cloud, eyes and voice practically oozing love out of them.

“Sephiroth will be leading on this kid, and you can bet your life and those of your squad he's got every precaution covered regardless of the situation. Trust that and more importantly trust YOURSELF cloud, it'll be ok then you'll be wondering what this conversation was for in the first place”. At that moment cloud could see how exactly zack had progressed to where he is now regardless of his carefree attitude of his, not to mention his love of life….. Which draws another conundrum to the blonde.

“How and why exactly is sephiroth leading this mission anyway?”

”Huh I was wondering when you would ask that?, well normally if the situation would call of it,he would send either myself, angeal or Genesis with you guys but the recent intelligence leads him to believe that his skill set is required more. Not to dispel our abilities or our capabilities but seph's practically a ghost when he moves, just like you when I really think about it. That's also why you're in charge, stealth is the key here. They reckon those you're observing are either enhanced beings like us or their well adept at espionage as well as stealth and that's it”.

“That makes sense I guess”. Cloud summarises. “Well I need to get moving then, hopefully I'll see you around 20:00, sound good?”

“Heh, just try and be late and there will be no mercy from me got it?” Zack says almost challenging cloud to test him. “Yeah yeah Mr big shot I've got it”. And with that and a kiss and brief hug cloud leaves, leaving zack laying there alone and wondering where this all so sudden dread came from and why only now was he feeling it,when not too long ago he himself told cloud not to mention it.

However for angeal it was another story altogether. He was really wondering if the man beside him can really compartmentalise as he said he would. Regardless of the look that he had when they left the office, zack wore his heart and every feeling he possesses on his sleeve. And while that's not necessarily a bad thing, when you see trauma, regardless if you're a professional like these two are, all of that decorum that one possesses goes completely out the window and rather than staying calm and letting the professionals handle it, well emotions can be your greatest strength and the cause of your untimely death. Even angeal, who has seen a man with shrapnel embedded in damn near life ending places can admit freely that hearing over the phone from sephiroth that cloud is laying on a stretcher, bandages and dressings wrapped so damn tight around his neck nearly sent him to his grave itself. But this was their reality of what they did, no matter how detached that sounded, that's the unfortunate and absolute truth.

“Hey angeal, where's Genesis anyway? Shouldn't he be there when they land too?” Angeal nearly missed zack's question, so caught as he were in his own train of thought. “I've left a message for him so if we're lucky he should already be there”. No sooner had the last word left angeal's mouth that the elevator stopped stating they had reached their final destination that reality hit the pair and boy did it hit hard.

One word was all that was needed to describe the scene in front of them. Chaos. Pure and simple as snow. The medical staff were lining the hallway, the rooms even the damn stairs trying to get the wounded into care, prioritising the urgent to the best cases, if you can call any of this madness “at best”. No sooner had that scene played before their eyes that a swift slamming of double doors followed by a stretcher with telltale head of blonde spikes came through followed by a literal bloody general carrying a bloody shirt and gun. And judging from the unusual display of anger and worry on sephiroth's face they could only imagine what fresh hell was about to follow.

“Come this way, it will be hours before we hear about cloud and the real condition he's in so let's get some semblance of peace while I'll feel you in”. And at that moment they knew that the ever fearless general was back.

And so here they are, in their own private hell waiting for Genesis to arrive and for the surgeon to tell them the prognosis of cloud. It's funny, they say when the gods wish to torment us, well they answer our prayers. At least they didn't have to wait in regards to Genesis's arrival, no sooner had they found an unused room and got some tea to at least try to calm themselves had Genesis appeared with all the wrath and elegance of a tiger on the prowl. Face screwed up like he was prepared for everything and let nothing at all. “Please tell me I'm not late. That they haven't declared him…just please”. And with that broken admission from genesis, the real pain kicked in.

“no genesis, no one's gone and the only thing you've missed is us trying to get our bearings back”. And with angeal's ever lasting grounded personality Genesis all but slumped to ground, if not for both angeal's and sephiroth's arms entwining with his own and sitting him down and preparing his own tea for the debrief that would either shed light on this day or forever more plunge them further to a higher form of despair, it at all possible.

TBC


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time. She's both kind yet cruel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again thank you for all the hits I'm receiving. I mentioned last chapter that I will post two at a time, however as im at work right now and will not be finishing till midnight im going to post two more now and resume again on Tuesday. That being said thanks again so much and I hope you enjoy :)

Dread Part 3 

Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters, nor do I intend to profit from them . All rights belong to square Enix.  


Time. Interesting thing she is. She answers to no one, never bows to wills of mere mortal beings such as yourselves. Time is her own mistress and that right there is what keeps everything and everyone grounded and yet at the same time terrified. And yet, she could be playful. But with only one game and that's ok because although she keeps her cards close to her chest, in the end there really is only one rule. Keep moving forward, simple. 

And so here they are, four men waiting. Waiting for time herself to once and for all to ensure this misery ends, whether in hope or despair, well you know the saying right?

“Only time will tell” 

“So seph what exactly happened? It was a standard operation right, so come half cloud's unit have been admitted whilst he is in the ER?”

Typical zack. Quick and to the point, an admirable trait in a SOLDIER. Alert and ready for any situation, but for this, well even more so. Though it begs the question of what time is thinking about this. Who is this man to rush her and her bidding, it's almost endearing really in fact they could very well be friends if not friendly rivals….. Yeah right who's kidding who here?

“Yeah you're right by all accounts. It was until one man mistook a bundle of gil for a grenade and well in the space of no more than ten minutes we killed or incapacitated the enemy. However it wasn't without cost”.

It's amazing really how he could explain all of this as though he was broadcasting the weather conditions for the upcoming days. But saying all this didn't necessarily mean sephiroth wasn't hurting. He knew the moment cloud went down that was when the real pain started. With all the speed as if the devil himself was on his heel, he rushed forward but up close he could see this maybe one battle he may have to give all to. The position of the bullet was at an awkward angle, meaning if remotely applying pressure wrongly could hasten cloud's death. Without preamble seph ripped his shirt while the medical got the dressing and bandages ready to apply much needed pressure but time wasn't waiting and all sephiroth could do was hope and pray that his actions weren't for nothing.

It's only now that sephiroth truly realises just how much blood cloud had lost and of the percentage, exactly how much he was wearing. As if sensing this, a faint mutter surrounds them. “Sephiroth go Home and wash it off, you smell of iron it's nauseating”. And yet there was no malice in genesis's words, just sorrow.

“He's right seph. We will all be here when you return, no offence but you look as if you have finished a rampage and are about to start another one”. Reluctantly seph agrees, sighing “ fine. But the moment you receive word on cloud you contact me immediately understood?” Angeal, true to his words agrees without delay “of course the moment we hear anything you'll be the first to know”. And so the general leaves but not before giving the ER room one fleeting glance, praying that he will see cloud again in this lifetime.

Meanwhile so consumed in despair that zack didn't notice Genesis approaching, setting down his stone cold ginger tea and putting a comforting arm around his shoulders. Damn did that nearly give him heart failure. “Talk to me zack, what's going on in that head of yours?”

“Dammit gen how did this all happen. Everything was perfect this morning, we woke up, messed around and said our farewells. And now cloud's in their fighting for his life. He said that he felt that this might happen, he mentioned that he dreaded this and now. I can't…. I just”

At that moment genesis was going to retort, claiming that was probably the nerves talking but one look at zack told him that he had already said that to cloud himself. “Hush now trust that his pull on life is just as strong as you are stubborn and that he will pull through and this will fade away to a painful and distant memory ok?” It's funny, they knew this was possible considering their line of work. And yet they are SOLDIERS, there enhanced enough to take a hit or two and act like it was merely a bee sting and yet cloud, who barely started as a newly third was taken down by one well timed shot to the neck. Really, was all of this really worth it? To see a person one moment for it to turn so deadly a second later. As if sensing gen's train of thought, sephiroth made his appearance. “Are now questioning what we do and who we are? because you're rather several years too late to now.” And just as genesis was about to retort that claim a rather burly fellow covered in a sheen of sweat and trace amounts of blood from cloud on his scrubs appeared and gave the news that would save or destroy them.

“Mr strife is for now out the war zone”.

TBC


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It takes seeing and hearing to believe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here's the second chapter for tonight until Tuesday. Enjoy :)

Dread Part 4

 

Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters, nor do I intend to profit from them . All rights belong to square Enix.  


Relief.  
Another one of those words. It could mean everything to those who are experiencing the worse horrors possible. One of those moments that this washes over them is right now as the four men follow the head trauma surgeon as he leads them to the room where their blonde companion awaits them. “The bullet nicked his subclavian artery, fortunately thanks to the efforts of both the general and the medical team, he managed to get through the worse of it. However, he did lose a significant amount of blood so for the time being we've given him a blood transfusion and now he needs plenty of bed rest. Once he's recovered he'll be coming back regularly should he still feel anemic. But for now it's looking good”.

And there it is,  
relief. It's almost euphoric how it just goes over you, smothers you really and yet that's fine because right now it's marvellous. Until the doctor says one thing you weren't expecting. “I would recommend that once this has all settled that he should be referred to a psychologist. Bare in mind he was in a near fatal incident, not to mention half of his squad was wiped out. He probably isn't aware of this so for now let's keep it that way until he's physically fit to handle the news ”. Surprisingly it was genesis that spoke next, “That shouldn't be a problem. However we will decide when that will happen. He is a SOLDIER so he has the mentality for combat but we do agree. But enough of that for now, is he awake?”

As if knowing of the famous temperance of genesis, the doctor merely turned, smiled and open the door to where cloud was situated. “ See for yourselves. Don't pressure him, take it slow. He's under a mild sedative but coherent enough”. And with that they enter the room they've been waiting for since this ordeal started.

It's painful how angelic cloud looks. Lying at an angle draped with a pale sky blue blanket looking peaceful as if his neck wasn't torn open. The only thing that gave away his ordeal was a deceptively thin looking bandage around his neck as well as his drawn in features. On either side of his hands were the iv's in his arms, one for the much needed blood, the other given him needed fluids. 

“Damn. He looks so frail i don't think it's even safe to even move his hair out of his face”. Leave it to zack to start with looks. Then again they couldn't really blame him, cloud really did look fragile.

Without preamble sephiroth approached, taking eager yet elegant steps as ever. Crossing the threshold, seph headed to the couch in the room, drawing his sword and leaning it against it, once finished he made his way to the corner of cloud's bed, gently sitting on the corner and ever so softly placing cloud's hand within his own. Practically holding a rare jewel or an ancient artifact that a faintest wind or slightest bump could destroy a once in a lifetime find. “I'm so sorry cloud. I wished i removed that man from the warehouse. Maybe if I did, maybe you wouldn't be here and that fool of a SOLDIER would be court martialed for insubordination”. 

Surprisingly zack was the one that drew the general back from his anguish of the situation. “Come on seph don't do that. Don't second guess the decisions made. It doesn't do anyone any good for our general to second guess everything when shit hits the fan. We all know that you've done the best you could've and you can bet that cloud knows that too”.

Angeal and genesis both made their way over. Both opting for the chairs by the bedside, both relieved themselves of their jackets and armour. They both took this moment to travel back in their own private memories of that one young man who has and still is making a remarkable change in all their lives. And whilst the three men are gathering their wits again, zack makes his way opposite the general and taking cloud's other hand in his while sitting down on the chair beside him. 

Now. Now relief hits them truly and boy doesn't it feel amazing?

TBC


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remembering doesn't mean reliving, it means accepting what once was can never be changed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi. I know i said I wrote post any more til Tuesday but i'm generally humbled by the response this is getting so as a thank-you I'm posting two tonight. Thanks so, so much for just giving this a browse and for the kudos I've received. So without delay, please enjoy :)

Dread Part 5

Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters. All rights belong to square Enix.   
Nor do I intend to profit from them

“Cloud. Come over here for a second please there's something   
I want to show you”. Genesis bellowed from the living room. Apparently decorum doesn't exist inside his home, so it's only right for gen to shout his commands across the place. Because really, who will tell genesis what to do?

“what's up? Did they finally acknowledge you as the undisputed king of red?” cloud's ever so cheeky yet loving voice flew through the room as he made his way over nonetheless and sat beside the redhead who without delay plopped the boy on his lap snuggling in his hair, all the while planting feather light kisses upon his scalp.  
“That's cute my sarcastic safe haven but sadly no. They have listed the areas for which you'll be stationed when you clear your mission router during your status as a third. See here? You'll be here in midgar permanently, then every six to nine months you move around our bases with one of us or with a fellow first. So I'm sorry to say you're stuck with us”.

“Damn and here I thought I might spread my wings and leave this little nest of ours. But I think i can handle being with you guys a little longer i guess”. Leave it to cloud to make a drama of how stoked he really was being here with them. He would be the first to admit that going off on his own to a different but no less large base on his lonesome without a familiar face to which he had to trust his life with was rather daunting, regardless if they were all on the same side. Familiarity eases everything and everyone, even when you're stepping out of your comfort zone.

“Well i'm sorry to inform that your a permanent member of us so no need to get yourself in a fit my child. You're safe with us. However if for some reason it doesn't pan out, you talk to us and tell us. You've done amazingly in these past months on top of your workload, so by all accounts you're due for leave as far as lazard is concerned. Don't stress yourself out. Remember SOLDIER builds you up not breaks you down got it?” It's been seven months since cloud made third, everyone knew of his relationships with the top first class but no-one could accuse him of necrotism, they knew cloud rose to his position on his own merit. Regardless cloud earned his place here in SOLDIER.

“ Yeah I do. I just, well you I've got a mission to the Warehouse right? I just can't help but think something bad might happen. You know what? I'm sure it's nothing, look it's our free time so no more work talk, deal?” Although genesis wanted to retort that he decided against it, and so the two snuggled on the couch with nothing but soft wine, easy entrainment and each other.

“Hey genesis, you okay over there? It looks as if you were heading over to another world without notice. And you know cloud hates when you do that, especially when you don't tell anyone why you do”. Zack surprisingly mellowed down voice breaks through his memory of the day. Not three days had passed since he had that fateful conversation with cloud, yet here he is, reunited with him. Though not in the circumstances he wanted.

“I'm fine, just remembering something that's all. Where did sephiroth go off to anyway?”. Genesis only now noticed that their general had vacated his spot with cloud.

“He's talking with lazard regarding this matter. Half of the unit were wiped out on a standard operation and that needs to be explained. He's not in the tower however, lazard knows of cloud's condition so he's on the phone to him outside.” Angeal informs genesis from his new position on the couch where he's doing maintenance and repair on cloud's gun. True they're SOLDIER, but this mission required finesse which thankfully cloud possesses, that and the fact he's not a bad marksman makes him pretty well adept at espionage as well.

“Hey angeal, when do you think cloud will wake up? I'm mean the doctor said that he was given a mild sedative right so how come he hasn't joined us?” Zack wonders out loud not really expecting an answer but was silently hoping for one. Despite the situation, it was rather endearing hearing zack ask with a hint of a childish manner.

“Give cloud time kid. Though he's enhanced, his not our level, not to mention his neck was torn open. He will return to us, but it will take time.” Angeal's ever lasting grounded personality waves in. They know that trauma of any kind takes time, regardless of the subject on which said injury had incurred on.

However a certain moan from a certain someone on a certain bed decided to prove angeal wrong.

And with that, pale blue but nonetheless alive eyes fluttered open through thin lids to a scenery he wasn't sure was really here.

“Hey kid welcome back to us. You doing ok?” leave it to zack to start everything off.

“Zack, angeal genesis. What's going on. Where am I?”

And then it happens. Everything comes back in full force. Pain. Death. Loud bangs around him. And judging from the erratic beeps from the heart monitor the three are aware of this also.

Cloud remembers everything and it's slowly tearing him apart from the inside out.

TBC


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reality isn't always a bad thing to face. It reminds us of what we overcome to get to where we are.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As stated, here's the second chapter for tonight. I'm hoping to keep my time scale of two per day, but you will all be the first to know if I can't. Anyways enjoy, I should point out that it may seem slow at the beginning I promise it won't be dragged out to point of boredom :)

Dread Part 6  
Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters. All rights belong to square Enix.   
Nor do I intend to profit from them

 

And with that everything happens at once. Both the head surgeon and general arrives upon noticing the disturbance inside. One demanding who has been causing distress to his patient, while the other is wondering what was wrong with his youngest charge. 

And so without delay the general took control of the situation. 

“Enough. All of you stop and calm down”. Without preamble seph walks over with all the patience and elegance and says seven words to his young SOLDIER.

“Calm down cloud. You're safe and sound”.  
And with that, cloud loses it completely and crumbles in sephiroth's arms wanting all of this to go and leave and to be nothing but a nightmare. And while that's happening, the other four are standing by with nothing but sympathy for the blonde boy who had all but collapsed in on himself. And offering security to a fragile young man.

“Cloud, the doctor needs to check out your vitals and your wounds. Are you well enough to allow this?” And with sephiroth's calm question and a small nod and sniffle cloud agrees.

All the while the other SOLDIERS are left reeling in the guilt that the situation has been acknowledged by cloud, knowing it had to happen but wanting to spare him suffering whilst he recovers.

And with a order not to press cloud further, the doctor leaves noting that he will return to check on his patient later on.

Without warning nor waiting for the surgeon or door to close, Zack all but jumps on the bed, gently sitting and gathering cloud in his arms.

“Hey you. Welcome back  
You need anything? Food? Drink? A baby chocobo to hold?” And with that last unusual question cloud soft but nonetheless real laugh was all that took the others to breathe a sigh of relief. Knowing that while it's only just begun, cloud's recovery will go forward without too much distress. 

“I'm fine thanks. Where is the rest of the unit that i was with? I know we took heavy fire but be honest with me. How much men did we lose?” And there it was. Reality. Never mind the fact that he almost died, cloud still manages to put duty ahead of recovery. And while that's admirable and not believing that none of this happened, now was not the time for such heavy conversations.

“Cloud. While we admire your concerns and worry regarding the unit, you are not physically fit to handle this right now. Any discomfort of any kind will cause distress to your heart and can cause your blood pressure to rise which will in effect, reopen the wound to your neck wide open again. So for now, relax and believe that we will discuss this with you later”.

Angeal's calming voice and gentle hand caressing his hair reluctantly forces cloud to push the subject aside for the time being and get the rest he truly deserves and requires right now.

“My sweet child. You do realise that you almost ended me with sheer worry alone. That's not an easy thing to do”. Ahh, leave it to genesis to bring drama back to the situation at hand. Only thing stopping angeal and sephiroth giving him stern reprimand for this was the unmistakable worry on his face and the near broken voice on which they were spoken with.

And with all the strength he could muster in his shape, cloud lifted a hand up in silent command that was obeyed without preamble from genesis to take and joining both cloud and zack on his bed.

“I don't think i've ever seen you run so fast in my career here seph. Though i suppose that's understandable considering the situation we were in but can you maybe in the future not do so with a scary look on your face again? There he is, cheeky yet endearing words from cloud. You would be forgiven for thinking that cloud wasn't nearly killed by the way he was acting.

With a small chuckle sephiroth merely nodded his agreement to cloud, taking his head between his warm hands and giving his forehead a loving kiss while murmuring “ providing you do not fall by an enemy's weapon again, you have my word young one”. And with those endearing words he pulled away stating that he has yet to finish his conversation with lazard and will return shortly.

And with that going on, a distinct vibration can be heard and felt prompting cloud, angeal and genesis to look at zack with vary levels of wonder, silently asking zack what is happening to his phone and when he would answer the thing.

Almost sheepishly zack scratched his head and mumbles “ Well it's kunsel. He heard what happened and is demanding an explanation and status update on cloud. I messaged him while gen spaced out that as soon as cloud came to I would talk to him”.

“Well i'm awake now zack. Go and talk to him. It's not as if i'm going anywhere. Not that i'm planning to either but your phone is jarring me and it's uncomfortable now”. Cloud states in his usual yet dialed down voice letting zack know that while he appreciates him being here, his friend also deserves to know how he's doing,   
considering that cloud himself is friends with kunsel and if the roles were reversed, he would want to be glued into the situation too. 

“Alright. I promise you it will only take thirty minutes tops. And then i'll be back”. And with that said zack gently untangles himself from cloud, allowing angeal to take his place and with a quick kiss to angeal and genesis followed by a calm stroke through his hair down towards the side of his face and kiss to the forehead for cloud zack makes his departure, hoping kunsel won't give him too much grief and that cloud will still be awake when he returns.

TBC


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes all you need is an ear to be listened to and voice to talk some sense to you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again!! I'm going to keep it short here, I appreciate everyone's time to just give this a look so here we go chapters seven and eight :)

Dread Part 7  
Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters. All rights belong to square Enix.  
Nor do I intend to profit from them

 

Not long after he left the room, zack had bumped into sephiroth who had just finished his conversation with lazard and was making his way back to his loves.

“Zack. Where are you heading? I doubt its work as we're on leave as of ten minutes ago. Though you are free to do as you please”. It's clear that while seph doesn't demand to know everything, considering the situation at hand it's rather alarming not to mention uncharacteristic for zack to be prioritising whatever is happening over cloud, who while has awoken, is nonetheless far from a stable condition.

“Hmm, oh kunsel is nagging for an update on cloud so I'm meeting him for a quick chat. And before you start on me, cloud told me to go. I get it, believe me i do. When i got injured cloud stayed by my side, even when he just got back from an intense mission away and while you all know that there's nothing I want more than to be by cloud's side, I also know that cloud, if the roles were reversed he would want an update on the situation. So please don't lecture me, I promise i'll be back before too long.”

Yet surprisingly sephiroth wasn't about to criticised zack, he wordlessly pulled the young man into a hug and murmured in his ear “ relax zack. I know you have a big enough heart to share with those around you. All the same you do need to clear your mind and speak to someone besides us about cloud. While he's safe and and alive right now, he may decide to return to work straight away or take leave given the fact that he almost died, it's a discussion we will take once it's finally been acknowledged and sunken in that he is fine. So for now go and see kunsel. A change of scenery will do you well ”.

And that was all it took for zack to weep in seph's arms. It was more than knowing that his decision to see kunsel was really ok, it was reality of knowing that the incident really did happen, that cloud was shot and is now in recovery. It's also the realisation that this situation could happen again for any of them, and the fact that cloud could very well indeed either choose to return to active duty once clear for it, Or decide to wait and take a hiatus from work, lazard only knows too well that it's been a long time since cloud had mandatory leave so it will hardly be any trouble to get him time off.

“It really happened. Cloud was shot. He almost died, so why now? Why can't i get my head around the fact that he just woke up. That I had him in my arms and we were talking? Please seph, tell me it really happened.”

“It really did zack. Do not feel ashamed that this has got to you. Our biggest fear is not death nor dying but rather letting all of this pass while being unaffected by it. You are human zack, treasure this hurt and relief for it will keep you grounded. Now go wash your face and see kunsel.” And with a gentle shove and kiss to push zack away from this place, that conversation was ended.

“Ok ok I'm going. And seph? Thanks I mean it.” And with a smile planted on his face zack headed to kunsel who was awaiting him.

And with a small nod of acknowledgement and a smile sephiroth headed back to where cloud and the others were awaiting his return.

Upon opening the door and greeting his SOLDIERS, seph was greeted by a sleeping cloud and a snuggling genesis beside him. 

“I think he grew tired waiting for your return general. Cloud fell asleep fifteen minutes ago”. A rather amused angeal declared from his returning spot on the couch, giving cloud's gear another look. 

“My apologies then. I will be sure to make it up to cloud upon his return to the conscious world. Sephiroth says with equal amusement leaning gently over to brush the hair out of both cloud's and genesis's faces and making his way to sit and immediately nuzzle into angeal's side.

“You know we've been so worried about cloud that we forgot about your well being, how are you holding up seph?” Angeal says into sephiroth's hair gently easing out his visible stress and anxiety that has fallen upon the general.

“I'm. Holding up fine. But I dare not say that this hasn't changed my opinion on sending you all out on to the battlefield knowing that this could very well be its outcome.

“Well it's who we are seph. Though i do agree nonetheless. We are human, looking at cloud proves that unquestionably. And yet none of us would hesitate to act accordingly should the situation calls for it again. For now let us be content that cloud has been returned to us relatively unscathed and be grateful for your quick response to the trauma he has suffered”.

“Even so. I've never known fear until I saw cloud fall, and seeing blood pool around him, knowing that materia would only hasten his death. Even so, angeal I will never forget the sensation of his life force draining from him as we all struggled to keep him with us. Even now it's not sinking in that it's been successful”.

Chuckling softly, angeal gently pushed sephiroth back to look in his face and say “ Well there's your proof seph. See? On that bed, cloud is lying there safe and sound”. And with a smile on his face sephiroth smiled back only to be bestowed a kiss and a reassuring squeeze before both relaxed on the couch and watch over the other two to before their return back to their realm.

 

“Zack!! Hey you ok”? Kunsel waving to an approaching zack who found them in return a small tucked away corner as well as food to start the conversation off.

“Hey yourself. I'm sorry it took me a awhile to get here”. Zack responded subduedly to his old friend. While he was happy to be out of the hospital, apart of him wanted to return to cloud's side knowing that what seph said to him prior to him meeting kunsel was necessary for him to do this.

“Come on now, it's fine honestly. How is cloud doing? I heard he was shot? Is he awake?”

“Yeah thankfully. The bullet nicked his subclavian artery, if it wasn't for sephiroth and the medical team on the mission we would be burying cloud not visiting him instead. He's not out of the woods yet but he's here with us, that's all i'm grateful for.” Zack practically coos gratefulness of the situation that they are in. 

“Well that's a relief. He's a real keeper for SOLDIER, I'm glad he's ok. If possible do you think i can see cloud soon? You know when he's able to handle more visitors that is?”

Laughing and getting back to his usual self zack cheerfully says “of course, I'll let you know when. It probably be a couple of days or so, that good?

“Hey, as long as he can handle company I can wait. You should head back, I know you want to go be by his side, just don't hold it all in, talk to me, even if it's just a quick chat ok?”

“Thanks man i appreciate it and i will. Sephiroth told me that as well, i call you later today”. And with a hug and farewells they both went back to where they were before.

When zack returned he was greeted by two sets of sleeping SOLDIERS. That in itself made reality hit zack and for the first time since cloud had been admitted, zack felt free from the fear he was holding in. And he smiled a big genuine smile before heading to the bathroom to freshen up.

TBC


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It takes a step back to take two forward.

Dread Part 8  
Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters. All rights belong to square Enix.   
Nor do I intend to profit from them

 

Cloud woke up with a start. Sweat was covering his forehead and clinging to his chest and legs, beside him genesis was pulling him closer, at the same time as being comforting, cloud needed to escape. It wasn't a familiar feeling, quite the opposite in fact, of wanting to leave one of his lover's embraces, but having re-lived the shooting in his dreams cloud was more and more longing to just breathe and move away.

“Easy cloud, i'll help relieve you of your predicament just relax a little otherwise you'll reopen your neck wounds.”  
And there he was, angeal in his saviour mode. Gently moving genesis, he grabbed hold of both of cloud's upper arms and very subtlety placing himself along with cloud in the chairs surrounding his bed. Gathering his cover, angeal cocooned cloud whilst placing him in his arms and plopping his own legs onto cloud's bed, setting them into an angle. 

“thank-you, I just needed to move, I can't explain it. It wasn't a bad feeling but I needed to get away”.  
Angeal softly laughed. Brushing his bangs out of his face, angeal leaned in and bestowed a kiss to his cheek murmuring to his ear “You had a nightmare. It's not a question nor a statement, merely an observation. Was it about the shooting?”

“Yeah. But not just that, it's sephiroth running towards me. It's zack telling me before I left on that day it's fine to feel nervous . It's genesis nearly breaking down cos of me getting shot. It's you keeping everything and everyone together knowing that this is history repeating itself, instead of zack being here it's me. Instead of a near fatal wound on me it's zack with large gashes to his arms and upper thigh”, it's….. ” without really realising that he had trailed of and had begun crying, angeal merely embraced cloud tighter, ever so gently guiding his head beneath his chin, he began softly rocking the young man to comfort.

“Shh cloud, breath nice and easy now. It's alright now kid, it's all okay. You're safe among those who love and cherish you, calm down nice and easy, your cries may become erratic and may lead to reopening the stitching in your neck”. 

Sephiroth woke up to hearing sniffles coming from his young charge. It was no surprise that nightmares may inflict upon him so soon , considering the circumstances. Three months in SOLDIER, cloud's very first mission, while not as deadly as this, it did plague cloud for four days, though with the help of genesis and himself, cloud was able to handle more missions knowing he had a support group at hand made it more bearable. Now that he faced and for the time being won over against death, it was only natural for cloud to slowly break. But that was fine, as long as he wasn't turning away from the situation, cloud would survive. 

“Cloud. You're safe with us here. It's alright now just breathe and control your tears, do not subdue them but rather let it all go nice and easy now.” Angeal says all so easily to him, and while he's doing as instructed, cloud slowly still feels as if he's trapped by it all. Sensing this sephiroth approaches and gentle takes cloud's hands into his own. 

“Cloud. You were saved by me and the medical team on the mission. You were in my arms while i called for an evac to get us home. I was sitting by your side on the helicopter holding your hands as I am doing now. There is nothing here for you to be entrapped by, listen to angeal and myself. You are here”.

As if that was all he needed, cloud stopped crying, merely slightly shaking from exertion of emotions, he drifted off to a sort of easy sleep. 

“Angeal. He will need us now more than ever. He will get past this but we will see episodes like this again along his recovery.”

“indeed. But it will be ok, cloud is stronger than we give him credit for. Time is on our side, we have leave now so we'll all be here to watch over him. Have faith seph, he'll pull through.”

As if noticing his bed buddy was no longer with him, genesis swerved to face them and immediately became alert of the situation.  
“What's happened? Is cloud doing ok?”  
“Yes. Just a nightmare, I'm afraid we will be seeing more as cloud recovers.”  
“Well i'm sure it will be fine once everything settles down. When will zack be returning?  
“I'm not sure but he really needed to escape from here, though he should be returning soon.”

And with a single nod genesis gets comfortable. Waiting for this storm to pass by with nothing but a hum on his mind. 

TBC


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Long journeys start from the beginning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And good morning from great Britain!! As promised here are two more chapters.   
>  Later down the road I'm going to go back to the beginning, basically a p.o.v chapter of the mission that resulted in cloud's hospitalisation but that probably happen in chapter 17. I'm actually writing that now. But for now enjoy :)

Dread Part 9  
Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters. All rights belong to square Enix.   
Nor do I intend to profit from them

 

Zack returned to a different scene he left from before . Genesis was Lying down on the bed with his head on sephiroth's lap, while cloud had vacated to the couch laying on top of angeal who was caressing his hair as if he were a cat. And judging by how out of it cloud was, perhaps he really was one. 

“Welcome back zack . How was your meeting with kunsel?” sephiroth's ever powerful voice softly drifted through the room, clearly not loud enough to disturb cloud at the far end of the room.

“It was nice, thanks for pushing me to go. When cloud's well enough he wants to come visit. I told him it'll be a couple days yet but that's fine for him. What's going on here? Did you kick cloud outta bed gen?” zack cheekily asked, expecting and ducking the pillow thrown at him, courtesy of genesis offcourse.

“Calm down zack please. Cloud had a nightmare so we moved over here to change the scenery somewhat. He's been in and out of consciousness for a while so I would prefer if you do not start anything with genesis for the time being please.” Only angeal has the authority to make zack listen, while sephiroth is the general, angeal remains his superior officer in some aspects, this being one example.

At the mention of “Cloud” And “nightmare” zack's playfulness turned to concern as he silently made his way over to the pair on the couch.  
squatting in front of the two, zack gently runs the tips of his fingers through the bangs of cloud's hair while directing his attention back to angeal.   
“It's hard to believe that all of this only happened six hours ago. Cloud looks like he's been here for a week. He really has been through the wars huh?”

“Yes he has, the doctor says he will most likely be discharged in a day or two, and will be given an appointment to see if he's blood pressure has stabilised. As for the stitching, they will remain for six months to ensure that the bullet hole has truly healed. His subclavian artery will by in that time have sown itself back together, the doctor is slightly worried he's developed a fever but is certain it'll pass. He's been confirmed to be anemic which considering the injury, that's not surprising. He won't be having another transfusion until his blood pressure has stabilised so he will be allowed to sleep as much as he wants and needs”. Sephiroth fills in for angeal who merely nods in agreement to zack, sensing any movement on his behalf will wake up cloud. 

At that moment genesis walked over, helping zack to right himself, only to be turned into a warm hug and murmured in his ear “ will you be strong from my child puppy? You weren't here when cloud's nightmares came through after his first real mission. They are far and few in-between, but what they lack in numbers they make up in intensity and given the fact that people jar awake that action could be fatal to cloud. We've all got leave off the same duration, depending on lack of emergencies so we all have to pitch in regards to my child's recovery. Will you be able to handle this? ”

Zack almost look affronted by the accusations genesis was throwing at him, the only thing stopping him from retaliation was earlier when he had to get away to see kunsel on sephiroth's advice and request, so really, genesis did have a valid point. 

“Yeah, i'll be able to handle this. At Least i think but I won't know until it happens but I'm definitely in if that's what you wondering.”

Sephiroth took this moment to sit in on a chair,   
having turned it around to face the others.  
“ Angeal, we need to wake cloud up. He's covered in sweat and his clothes need changing least he catches a cold and an infection”.  
And so with ever great reluctance, angeal woke up cloud.

“Kid, cloud we need you awake. You're going to catch a cold due to the amount of sweat your producing.

Wearily cloud woke up, although he was swerving as if he were drunk, luckily zack was able to right him. “ I really don't feel too good right now, I can't handle a shower, at least not right now anyway”.  
“That's alright my child, it's unwise for you to do so. There's a bowl and wash cloths we will use, so let's get you sitting on the bed again, shall we?”  
And so with literal baby steps, cloud aided by zack and genesis moved back to his bed while angeal and sephiroth went to the bathroom to get the necessary items required. 

“Hey gen, you know I've been wondering something for a while now”. Zack broke through the din, the only noises being produced were from the bathroom and cloud's laboured breathing.

“And that will be what puppy?”  
“Well, why do you call cloud “My child ” I mean don't get me wrong it's endearing but I'm just curious is all”.  
“Hmm, if you must know. When we sleep cloud naturally falls to the fetal position, regardless of the weather or the place on which he falls asleep, he does so without fail, though only around me. So I call him “My child ”.  
“Huh  
That's really cute, so cloud are you aware that you do this?” Zack stops gently helping cloud out of his nightwear to ask him.   
“Well sort of, I know i curl up but the shape? Not really, no”

And with that confession, zack burst into laughter while genesis soothingly holds onto cloud's hand as he kicks off his pants.

“Alright, this should be warm enough. Cloud come stand on the towel please. You don't need to do anything me and angeal will handle the clean up. Genesis, hold cloud steady, zack go and arrange dinner, make sure cloud's is light and has a quite high sugar level”. And with an affirmative from zack, the clean up of cloud had begun.

Fifteen minutes later cloud's dressed in a gray loose fitting t-shirt and white pants, securely wrapped in bed with zack as a pillow and food settled in front of them. The other first class men are dotted around the room each in companionable silence, the only noises are that of cuttery clanging on the dishes.

Ten minutes later sephiroth notices that cloud has touched little to no food whatsoever and subtlety calls him out on it.  
“Cloud, my young one are you not hungry at this point of time?”  
Of Course, his subtlety gathers the others attention.  
“I'm not.. … really. I just”  
Having already felt the telltale signs of tears, zack eases cloud's head into the crook of his neck, all the while making soothing motions on his back with his hands.  
“Hey come on now it's alright cloud. Were not angry with you, just concerned about you and your lack of appetite that's all. We won't push but do you wanna talk about it? It might help? But again we won't push”. Zack says soothingly in cloud's ear, all the while making eye contact with the equally worried men.

“I'm just so tired, and i can't do a damn thing about it. It's too much, I'm sorry, i'm really sorry”.

“No that's fine you do not apologise for it cloud. It's only been ten hours since you were shot so it's going to take time. But know that you don't need to rush in any way whatsoever ok? Just relax we've got you kid”. And with that zack kissed cloud's crown whilst he felt him drifting into a hopefully deep and restful sleep.

TBC


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The old saying "laughter is the best medicine” is more factual then you will ever know.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So no drama here.... For now anyways!! Also no lengthy info in this note just a feel good chapter. So enjoy :)

Dread Part 10  
Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters. All rights belong to square Enix.  
Nor do I intend to profit from them

It's been two days since the shooting had happened and now more than ever cloud was waiting and wanting to go home  
Sitting on the couch wearing what he wore to bed, cloud was pulled out of his musings by a knock on the door 

“Come in ”  
“Hey cloud.”  
“Kunsel!, hey, how are you?  
“I'm pretty sure that i'm supposed to ask you that!”

And with eager steps kunsel entered the room, gently sat beside cloud and each pulled the other into a gentle hug.  
“I must say that you look pretty good for a man who was shot in the neck. ”  
“Well what can I say, it brings out my glow”.

And with that they both broke into a fit of giggles until kunsel was unwilling to get to the main reason for the visit.  
“Cloud. I'm so, so sorry about your squad. Has zack and the others mention the casualty lost?”  
“No. But I'm guessing it's really bad. Isn't it? ”  
“Cloud. I'm sorry. Half of the unit were wiped out. You were the most critically wounded out of the squad, and from what I heard, the SOLDIER who refused to obey you and the general only got off with gashes and a bullet torn through his thigh. He'll probably be released in a week. Cloud, there is going to be a court hearing for this, you will have to testify to the board in regards of the mission. It's gonna bring everything up again but i'm going to be there, ain't no ways I'm leaving you to suffer through that on your own. Zack, genesis, angeal and sephiroth will be there too, but on official duty so they will be separated from you but i will be sitting right by your side holding your hands ok?”

Nodding almost numbly, cloud wasn't even aware he was crying until kunsel reached up to wipe the tears away and pull him to his chest.

“Hey it's alright now. I know it hurts like hell and nothing I nor anyone else can say will make this all go away. But cloud, you're not in this alone. I'm here, so are the others. It's gonna hurt for a long, long time but you will be ok. I promise. ”

At that moment genesis walked in, but he didn't approach, rather he leant against the door jamb and watched kunsel comfort his fondly called “child ”.

“Do. Do you when it will happen? I guess it's gonna occur when we're both well enough for it and the questions that will be asked right?” It's painful how much sorrow there is in cloud's voice. Regardless of the fact that he's the victim, so to speak but all the same it's hard not to notice the subtle undertone of anger there. 

“I think you asked something that I actually don't know about cloud.” kunsel laughing words manages to bring a small smile onto cloud's face too.  
“But, when it happens I will personally come over to get you and stay throughout the whole ordeal ok?, we have a deal?”  
“Deal. Thank-you kunsel, so much.”  
“You're very welcome cloud. Oh I think your chauffeur has arrived. ”

And he was right as at the moment they both noticed that genesis was there, and judging from the smile on his face, they could with one percent accuracy say that he heard everything.

“And a very good morning to you my child, kunsel. How about we get you home now, sound good? ”  
“Actually yeah it does. Can you help kunsel?, I can't stand up on my own yet, well not without everything spinning on me.”  
Laughing, kunsel replied “Sure thing cloud and up we go.”  
Taking slow, easy steps the pair along with genesis, who has gathered cloud's belongings eg, his gun, armour and the rest of his uniform minus his top headed down to the reception desk where cloud's medication and new dressings were kept for him. 

“Ah good morning Mr strife how are you feeling today?” cloud's doctor says, signing some paperwork, including cloud's required absence from work forms as well as his prescription for the wound he sustained.  
“I'm fine thanks, a bit dizzy and still very tired even though I slept really well. But apart from that I'm good.”  
“The dizziness is caused by the anemia you're experiencing, which in turn is causing the sleepiness you're feeling as well, it will fade away in time, however all you can do is rest. And plenty of it too. Which means no running, weight training, hand to hand combat or any other body straining exercises understand?”  
“Yes sir. I understand.”  
And with a smile the doctor agrees  
“Good. You're blood pressure this morning is fine, if not a little erratic but that's fine considering your being released today. I'm booking you in for a further blood transfusion in the next few days, so you'll need an escort, so to speak to help you walk and such.”

Genesis, of course chose that exact moment to be a drama Queen “ My good sir. Rest assured that not only will cloud be compliant to your request but one of us will attend the appointments with him. Will that suffice?”

“Genesis!!!” cloud practically sobbed while the doctor, the nurse stationed there and kunsel burst out laughing at that display. 

“Well if that's all? Cloud, I will be seeing you in a few days.” And with a solid handshake to all three gentlemen the doctor went to do his rounds.  
“So. Ready to come home my child? ”  
“Yeah. Let's go home.”

TBC


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Walk with your head held high.  
> Laugh when you need to, for that's all you need to do to prove you survived.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!! It's now just gone eight in the evening here in the UK, for those across the pond.  
> Sadly I'm working tomorrow.... So I'm posting two more again tonight!!! Thanks so much again for those who have been reading this.  
> So enjoy :)

Dread Part 11

Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters. All rights belong to square Enix.  
Nor do I intend to profit from them

Cold.  
It's a strange feeling to possess. It's more than goosebumps activating on the skin when cold air whips past you.  
It's almost a hollow feeling, kinda on par with dread. That sinking feeling you get when you can't explain it but you know that there's going to be a bad turn of events, very soon, not too soon you're glad for, but it will happen. 

“Cloud. My child, are you alright? You've gone pale not to mention your sweating all over again”. Genesis's words cut through your anxiety, not five minutes after they left the hospital, a car pulled up that would transport them to the main building. Cloud found himself sitting by the window with genesis facing him and kunsel by his side. 

“I think so. Sorry gen, i was just thinking about this court hearing that's going to happen. Do you know what the procedure is for it?”  
“Yes. But it's not as bad as you're making it out to be. Think of the debriefs you give to lazard upon completion of a mission, it's exactly that but with all the top first as well as lazard and each head of unit of SOLDIER being in attendance . Rest assured my child, YOU are not under fire, nor are you at blame here. You were in charge of the entire situation until that stupid man decided that insubordination would be a great idea. And best you would only be there for around ten to twenty minutes tops. Don't worry nor stress over this my child, it's all formality. ”  
“I see. Thank-you genesis.”  
“Cloud. Genesis does have a point, you really don't look too well. You doing ok?”  
Nodding to kunsel worried question cloud leans his head against the cold window, watching the scenery change before falling into a sombre state of sleep. 

Twenty minutes later cloud wakes to gentle tapping of his shoulder as well as a soft murmuring of his name.  
“Cloud. Wake up pal were here”. Kunsel's ever friendly face drifts into view. “Kunsel?”  
Laughing, kunsel eases cloud up as they make their way to the elevator that would take cloud home.  
“Genesis got a message from lazard, apparently he's overdue for an annual physical. Don't fret he's seeing the same doctor who treated you, not going to the labs”.  
“Ok. Truthfully? I didn't realise he wasn't here”.  
And with a chime from the elevator and a belly splitting laugh from kunsel they headed up.

No less than ten minutes they arrived on the floor of which cloud lived. Being a third gives you space and privacy which completely makes up for any traumatic experiences you gather from the community showers. 

“You are not supposed to be here kid  
You're meant to be at my apartment remember?”  
Ahh typical zack. No “Hey buddy welcome back” or “I'm glad you're here!”, nope straight into kinda work mode. “Kinda” meaning that none of them are on active duty, so technically he can't boss any of them around. Sweet.  
“Zack. I can't stay in just these clothes, I came here to get more as well as books and pads to work and draw in while I recover. I am aware that I have to be supervised for awhile”.  
And with a cheeky tongue stuck out to zack, cloud walks in to pack what's needed. 

“He's doing ok zack. he was slightly off when we rode here by car but I think that had to do with the impending hearing.  
He's a tough one, he'll be good. ” kunsel's ever grounded personality keeps once again zack chilled.  
“Yeah. Yeah he is, thanks by the way, offering to stay with cloud whilst the hearing takes place.  
“It's no problem. Cloud's great, he reminds me of you. Caring, loving of life and such a good person in total. You know, minus your energy off course. ”  
“Yeah off course.” And with a big smile and laugh equally big, both men gave each other a hug. One conveying gratefulness that cloud's safe and for their chat.  
The other letting them know they're not going through this alone and that he would be there from them both anytime. 

Fifteen minutes later cloud reappears with a duffle bag containing his necessarily belongings.  
“Hope I'm not interrupting anything gents?” Yep cloud's fine, if his cheek comments are anything to go by. Said comments were bestowed as just as cloud exited his apartment both zack and kunsel by were just breaking their hug up.  
“I'm sorry cloud. I couldn't help it. Kunsel is too damn huggable!!!” And with a chorus of laughter the three SOLDIERS went to zack's apartment. 

TBC


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It really does get better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No theatrics here!!  
> Enjoy :)  
> P.s I've made an error. I haven't changed the dates of when I post the chapters *face palms the door*, however ignore that, I KNOW now what to do. So just know for future reference I will post two at a time. However I will change the dates now I know how to do so. Sorry!! And enjoy.... Again

Dread Part 12  
Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters. All rights belong to square Enix.  
Nor do I intend to profit from them

After parting ways with kunsel with promises to meet each other later, zack and cloud headed into zack's apartment.  
While it was HUGE in comparison to cloud's, it was still modest in every sense of the word.  
“make yourself at home, you know where everything is right?” zack's question breaking the comforting silence around them.  
“Yeah I do, thanks. I'm gonna have a quick wash. That ok?”  
“I love the fact that you still ask after all this time! It's fine, go ahead”  
At that moment, both zack and cloud fell into this space. Not outer worldly but not in this lifetime either. Maybe they were falling through a gap in-between. 

As if they were old friends that haven't seen each other for at least a decade, both fell into the other's arms with a childish laugh.  
“I know i probably haven't said this outright but i'm really, really glad you're still with us cloud. I not ready to say goodbye to you yet. I know this is just beginning but…. But know that whatever happens, at the hearing or in your career choice, Just know that I will back your play, one hundred percent. Take whatever time you need, and if it's still not enough, if you can't grab hold of your life as you had before. Know that I will always AND still love you kid. Always”

At that exact moment it became too much for cloud. And what felt like the hundredth time this week, He cried and as promised, zack was there to ride it out with him. 

“It's too much zack. No matter how I play it out in my head, no matter the fact that I KNOW i did everything by the book. I remember the shooting, I can still feel the bullet hitting me. I remember falling to the ground. I can still feel my blood on my skin and no matter how much I wash it doesn't come off. I can still FEEL it on my skin zack….. I need it to go”. Sorrowfully zack agreed  
“I know cloud. I do, and no matter how many times we could say to you “hey it's gonna be ok cloud ”, the truth of the matter is, we don't know how long it will take kid. But know this, I'M here cloud, we all are. That feeling?, it WILL fade away. I promise you”.

And with those words zack guided a wary cloud to his couch where zack all but flopped upon it, gently laying cloud on top of him.  
“You're going to be ok cloud. Promise.”  
Not surprisingly cloud didn't reply, for he had fallen asleep. With a soft chuckle and a kiss to his cheek zack carefully picked up the remote and turned on the TV, waiting for the others to arrive. 

Approximately two hours later, angeal followed closely by sephiroth made their way inside, and judging by the fact that the TV is turned down softly they could surmise that cloud is here, and more importantly getting some rest.  
“Welcome back You two. How did it go?”  
Zack's softly asked question drew the two to the couch where they saw the youngest of their group laying down.  
“surprisingly well” Sephiroth responds “As of now we are all on leave. Genesis has gone to review his psychical has he?”  
“Yeah,although he should be done fairly soon”.  
With a small, almost missable nod, sephiroth approached the pair, moving cloud's discarded duffle and sitting beside them.  
“Zack has cloud eaten yet,  
if not would you like me to fix you two up something?”, leave it to angeal to mother hen everyone, though at this moment, it was truly welcomed.  
“Erm, no we haven't yet, although I'm really reluctant to wake him. Angeal,..... He's really struggling to cope with all of this, he told me so himself.”  
Angeal took this moment to return to them, handing over food to sephiroth, he approaches zack while running a soothing hand over through his hair, he softly rubs cloud's back. Grabbing zack's attention, he replies  
“The fact that he's acknowledged all of this means cloud IS coping zack. He may seem as know he's taking three steps back, but believe that cloud will pass through this puppy, that's all we can do. We all know what happened, none of us are shying away but it only happened few days ago, give cloud time, he will survive.” And bestowing a kiss to zack, he sets food for zack to munch on while returning to make himself and genesis some lunch. 

Once finished, sephiroth approached the pair on the couch. Kneeling down he gently moved the hair out of both of their faces and softly asked “Would you like me to move cloud so you can eat without fear of disturbing him ?”  
“Aww but we haven't snuggled up for ages and now you want to take cloud away from me!?!?” Zack playfully whines but nonetheless accepts sephiroth's offer.  
Easing him off from atop of zack, seph carries cloud bridal style across the room where he situated them both, with angeal joining them. Genesis arrives shortly after, and with the whole gang here, so to speak, the group settled down for the night. 

TBC


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You need to face reality in order to accept what's to come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there!! I'm being naughty and instead of working, i'm posting new chapters instead.   
> Though that's a good thing, so here we go and thanks again for those who have been reading this and so much more. :)

Dread Part 13 

Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters, nor do I intend to profit from them . All rights belong to square Enix. 

History.   
It's a funny thing, it means things that have past. Things that occurred sometimes in our lifetime, although most commonly than not it happened in the last generation's time. And yet at the same time it happens yesterday or a week, even a month ago,   
and here's the real kicker. It's happening while you do things, maybe not revolutionary nor world news worthy but still, it's still being made. 

And that applies here too. It's been a week since that day. The memory, hell even the wounds are still raw and yet as cloud stares at the letter in his hands he realised something he already knew   
“Time waits for no man”.

Indeed, right there, plain as day, a hearing date has been set. In less than a week cloud will have to testify to the board exactly what happened to the squad, the enemy and also himself.   
You would think this was a good thing, a man will have to be accountable for his actions that got half of his team killed and landed one in a critical condition. While cloud was indeed out of hospital he was far from stable. His subclavian artery had indeed knitted back together but he did lose a significant amount of blood and so required two more transfusions as well as an additional month of rest to ensure his anemia faded out. He was alive and incredibly lucky to be so, however no matter how he looked at it the fact remains he was a casualty in this aswell, so he will have to testify to that.   
Now don't get the wrong idea, cloud's not so shy and timid that he would fall on his own sword just to keep the blame from falling on anyone but himself, nor was he above admitting fault of his own or honestly accusing any he knows to be in the wrong. What's got him stressed is the fact he will have to face the man who caused all of this pain and death unnecessarily, the same man who hasn't said anything to anyone let alone him. This man who hasn't even asked if he was ok, I mean REALLY, he was shot down right beside him, was practically drenched in his blood, this supposed “SOLDIER ” has been quiet throughout the whole ordeal while cloud himself was suffering. 

“Cloud. It doesn't matter how many times you read that, you know it won't change nor will make it disappear”. Angeal's softly spoken strong words drew cloud back to the present. He's been sitting in the exact same spot zack helped him to for the past twenty minutes, not once moving to grab something to eat or even attempting to either, and right now that's more pressing than an event that will happen a week from now right? So why….. 

“I know, sorry. I'm just… I don't know what to think nethermind what to do. I haven't spoken to that man since we were on route to the Warehouse and now, now I have to face him knowing what happened. I can't…. It's… I can't ”  
And with a gentle smile angeal moves cloud, removing the letter from small hands to replace it with cuttery, he sat down bringing cloud onto his lap and dished out some food to eat.   
“Cloud. I know you're not shy and I know you're definitely not bashful when it comes to stating your opinion. You don't need to see him, nor do you need to feel obligated to speak to the man either. Just say your piece with your head held high knowing you're in the right and know that he will be accounted for his own actions and keep in mind that the loss of life is on his shoulders, not yours. let the ghost haunt his dreams, not your own ”.  
It's amazing what a solid, truthful peptalk can do for someone, and while he knew the words spoken by angeal to him were true, he couldn't help but sadly say   
“Angeal? I'm scared. I can't, no I DON'T think I can handle being in the same room as him, as Alfie.” A sudden realisation occurred that this was the first mention of the SOLDIER'S name and it was making cloud feel slightly ill. He knew the man, spent months, years even with him, training with him, trusting him with his life when the situation calls for it and now….. He can't mention his name without this, this almost vice like grip to his stomach.   
“Oh cloud. Kid it's alright, don't do that to yourself. Don't make yourself sick on his account.” sure enough, cloud did indeed look as if he was going to throw up, and judging by how quickly angeal sat him down, retrieved a bucket from the kitchen and place by cloud's feet, he was just in time for cloud to vomit. 

“Easy cloud, easy. Don't force yourself, let it happen ”. He hated this. The guilt. The anger he felt towards himself and to Alfie. To his fallen enemies. All of it. He wanted it gone. He NEEDED it gone. 

And judging by the warm, safe hands wrapped around his back and through his hair, cloud could guess that angeal understood and for some reason it made him angrier, not at angeal or his other boyfriends, no, he was angry with himself and wasn't afraid to voice it.

“I'm sick of it! I'm sick of feeling tired, of having my dead friends last moments play on repeat in my head! I'm fed up with thinking I should of, could of done better! I've had ENOUGH!!” and at his last yell of self hatred cloud slumped to the ground, bringing his knees to his chest and running trembling hands of anger through his hair. He's had enough and no matter what anyone says, he won't allow himself the privilege to cry, he's already done enough of that. 

However, someone out there decided that cloud did need to, he needed to let it go, for he will self destruct if he didn't. And so history dictated that in order to progress one must face ugly truths in order to learn from them, so bearing that in mind angeal silently made his way over to the angry young SOLDIER, calmly applying pressure to his arms and softly said “Cloud. I, we could say “we know ” And “we understand ” until we draw our last breathe. But we don't. We can't say without pause what exactly is going on in your head right now. Nor will we mock your intelligence but cloud, you're going to hurt yourself if you don't get this out of your system . We don't care if you shout, stomp your feet and throw a fit that could rival that of genesis, but please, please don't hate yourself nor how you feel about any of this. Half of the unit you were in was wiped out, YOU nearly died, those are hard facts. You haven't mourned for them nor have you mourned for yourself, that life you once had is gone now, it may never return and you need to acknowledge all of this for you to truly be free and healed”.And with that angeal drew away, collecting the bucket and leaving the young man alone. As cruel as it may seem, one cannot help another if they do not help themselves. And with the door pulled ajar, he left with the sound of cloud breaking down and rebuilding himself, leaving a sad yet hopeful smile upon angeal's face. 

He didn't know how much time had passed since angeal left him alone in the kitchen, all he did know was that once he cried and yelled to he couldn't anymore and slowly fell asleep where he was, cloud found himself not on a cold, hard floor but on a soft, warm couch with a equally warm hand carding through his hair. Slowly he opened his eyes to see a small smile gracing his general.   
“Good morning cloud, how are doing this morning? ”  
Before he could even get his grey matter to function, cloud couldn't explain it but he felt like hugging the man and cry some more. And so he did.   
Surprisingly sephiroth understood what was happening, upon arriving at angeal's he asked as to where his young charge was and was mildly surprised by what angeal told him.   
“I left him alone in the kitchen. He hasn't mourned his squad mates nor himself and I made him confront that before it destroys him”. Sephiroth understood the full effect death can have on someone. Taking a life and losing one are one in the same, it's gone and will never return. Though cloud has seen combat and did what was necessary to protect himself and his fellow SOLDIERS the fact remains he's never been in a scenario where it resulted in so much death in one instance, so although it may have been rather unorthodox, he did agree with angeal's assessment and course of action regarding cloud.   
Wrapping his arms around cloud, sephiroth merely said “I'm glad you're confronting this instead of doing so when time comes for the hearing and you cannot cope. I'm at least grateful for that much.”And with those words cloud cried just a little bit more before falling asleep for a moment. 

Half an hour passed by the time cloud slowly awoke to a gentle touch to awaken him to get something to eat and refresh himself before going through a walk-through as to what to expect from the hearing and how it will unfold. 

“basically a board of directors of SOLDIER, platoon leaders as well as ourselves will be asking for a minute by minute detailed account of precisely what happened, starting from arriving at the vehicle to you waken up in the hospital. They may seem as they're attacking you, your character and the words spoken but no one is going to turn you out to be the bad guy . It needs to be broken down from scratch as to how the scenes unfolded from the top. We won't be asking any questions merely overseeing the record as SOLDIER. ” Sephiroth informs cloud while angeal wraps an arm around his shoulders for support for a strong, yet still healing young man.   
“So basically it's a very formal show and tell?” “Where. Where will Alfie be seated? Will i see him, like will it be obvious that he's there where I have no choice but to see him. I can handle the hearing, the questions and all of that. But I don't think i can handle seeing him, he is, was even a friend and now, now he's just a man who took apart of my life and ended everyone else's. I can't handle seeing his face, at least not so soon anyways ”.  
“Unfortunately, because of the nature and seriousness of this Alfie will be sitting right by us, with a JAG in attendance. Most likely you'll be cross examined by him. You'll have me as your counsel if that should occur seeing as I was the overall C.O in attendance at which case i will be answering the questions from his lawyer, so you needn't have to give him any attention whatsoever. Cloud, all you need to do is say what happened and be done, leave the worry to the enemy ”  
And with a worried yet all so strong nod cloud agrees, well for that but….  
“When it's done, can we go out, at least away from the building, just for a little while? ” And with a strong, solid laugh from angeal and a chuckle from sephiroth, the heavy conversation was finished. They knew. Cloud can and will survive this. 

TBC


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harsh truths, though hard hitting sometimes they need to be heard without preamble.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the second chapter for today. Little warning there is a bit of drama ahead though I think necessary to have. sooo enjoy until tomorrow :) P.s also because I'm using American terminology where I can, I've researched this and it turns out that the military aswell as the navy have legal aid known in their field as JAG. So just in case anyone is thinking I'm butchering anything, I did look it up.

Dread Part 14

Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters, nor do I intend to profit from them . All rights belong to square Enix. 

Shock.  
This one feeling is a real kicker. You don't see it coming. It gives no warning, no heads up as to its arrival. It comes. Period. End of discussion. And yet we still react to it as if we were reacquainting an old friend. Nerves on fire, heart and lungs having a fight to the finish to get out of your throat as soon as possible. Yeah shock, damn it's a terrible, terrible feeling to experience. 

That's precisely what cloud's feeling now. After his conversation with angeal and sephiroth, things went fine, he managed to grab something to eat and just relax, not worrying about anything, like the general said “leave the worry to the enemy ”. So you could understand why cloud was blinking, just blinking at his phone. The reason why, you ask? Simple.  
Alfie was calling him. 

Alfie. The SOLDIER whose actions resulted in his team nearly all being wiped out and nearly himself with them. The man who he considered a friend, a comrade, a brother in arms. And now, now he doesn't know what to feel about the man.  
He was relieved to know that he was alive and at the same time he hated the man, he knew that hate was a very strong word for him. But he couldn't help it, after all, he CAUSED all of this. 

“Cloud? My child what's going on? Why are you staring at your phone instead of answering it?” Genesis voice cuts through the shock he's feeling. Without answering immediately he merely turns his tear filled eyes towards genesis, shows his caller display and says so softly, almost missable “He's calling me. It's Alfie.”

Two things happen at once. First cloud's tears fell. The second thing is that genesis grabs both cloud's hand and phone, places cloud by his side in a soothing embrace and answers the call. 

“I assume that your calling cloud in act of genuine sympathy and concern for his well being, and that your JAG is aware that your calling, knowing anything you say could be used against you in the hearing correct?” now cloud has seen genesis well and truly pissed before. He's seen genesis take his anger out on an unsuspecting trash bin before. Seriously a plastic bin has no chance against fire. But this anger genesis is showing now? It's scaring him. 

“Uh. Yeah, yeah my JAG is aware of this, although he isn't happy about it ”  
“Well that makes both of us then doesn't it? ” At this point genesis is seething, he's well passed pissed. He's livid.  
Sensing that something's amiss, zack rounds the corner along with kunsel and angeal wondering what has genesis angry. What they weren't expecting was a silently crying, rightly scared cloud in an almost vice like grip in genesis's arms and genesis practically hissing like a cat on the phone.  
“I know. I know i don't have the right to do so, but please. Can i please talk to cloud? I need him to know i'm sorry. Sorry for all of this”. At that Alfie broke into tears as well, while that's commendable that he's just as affected by all of this as well, The fact remains that he was ENTIRELY responsible for all of this and right now, crying through the phone to genesis was THE worst thing to do.  
“Sorry. Sorry for all of this you say? ” At this genesis gets up, leaving a shaking cloud alone and starts pacing and enters full blown SOLDIER rant mode. 

“SORRY DOESN'T CHANGE WHAT YOU DID!! IT DOESN'T HELP CLOUD WHEN HE WAS SHOT AND NEARLY BLED OUT IN FRONT OF YOU. NOR WILL IT EVER BRING EVERYONE BACK FROM THE DEAD. YOU STUPID, INCONCEIVABLE PRAT”.

Both zack and kunsel immediately becomes aware of who's on the phone and quickly embrace and try to calm cloud down who's clearly on the verge of either a full blown panic attack, hyperventilation or both. While all of this happens angeal heads outside to call sephiroth whose finishing any paperwork left. Though technically on leave, paperwork waits for no one. 

“I know. I just, please. Please just let me for a couple of minutes let me speak to cloud. ”

“YOU DON'T GET TO BEG. YOU WILL NOT RECEIVE SYMPATHY FROM ME OR ANY OF US. IS THAT CLEAR?!”

Zack looks at genesis with a mixture of anger and grief. Anger, for he knows that alfie was and still is responsible for all of the pain that cloud's facing and has overcome but grief at knowing that Alfie lost friends too, was injured as well and the fact remains that for now anyways he's still a SOLDIER, and every fibre is telling zack he deserves sympathy for the loss as well. And by the looks on both kunsel's and cloud's faces, they feel the same, Especially from cloud. Zack feels proud that despite all of this, cloud still wants Alfie in his life.  
“He needs to stop. Please tell genesis to stop. I… I don't want this. ” broken, clouds words reach zack and kunsel, but they all know… Genesis won't listen to them, not in this state of mind at least.  
“Shh cloud. Angeal is calling sephiroth, he'll know what to do. Just stay here with us cloud, focus on us. Our smells, our presence. On me holding your hands and zack kissing your head. Just try to forget ”. At that moment that's all kunsel can offer to cloud. That and hoping that sephiroth will come soon. 

Five minutes in, sephiroth appears. Clearly not happy with this but clearly in control. Swiftly he gives acknowledgement to the three sitting down on the couch and approaches genesis who surprisingly still has his voice, takes cloud's phone without argue and calmly says “Alfie. Do you know who this is? ”  
“Gen. General sephiroth. Sir”. Yeah, based on the stuttering, he knows.  
“Very good. I appreciate your call,  
I also understand and know that you are suffering as well. But now is not the time for such conversations to take place.” ignoring genesis's attempts to retort and grab the phone back, sephiroth merely raised a hand in warning to the redhead and continues his very civil conversation with alfie.  
“I assume you are aware that talking to cloud is in itself an act of admission of guilt and responsibility on your behalf correct? ”  
“Yes sir”.  
“Very well in that case this conversation is over. You are not to address cloud in any ways whatsoever until the hearing is finished, we will not have you undermining cloud, his conscious or his account of the mission. Nor will we expect the same to happen to you. We are SOLDIER, regardless, we look out for our own. I will not give you the satisfaction of you villain filling me or any of us. However if you want to speak to someone I will send you a business card with myself and angeal's number so you can speak without bias to us. I'm generally sorry for what you've been through and know that once the dust has settled, we will still be civil. Agreed?”  
“Yes sir. Agreed”.  
“Very well. Rest SOLDIER. For the real fight will begin soon. ” And with that sephiroth ended the call. Clearly not impressed he turns to genesis.  
“I understand your anger, however it doesn't change the fact that you will be attending the hearing and in antagonising alfie is in itself an act of intermediation towards him. You will not do so again. If He remains in SOLDIER, alfie could well indeed be under your care upon a mission and it will not do him or anyone else good if he doesn't feel safe in your command. Am i clear genesis? ”  
“crystal general”. And with that genesis stomps away heading for the front door and slamming it shut.  
“I will see that he doesn't do anything brash” Angeal breaks the tension, saying goodbye to others,he heads out to find genesis, hoping he's not doing something he will later regret. 

TBC


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You need to lash out at times in order to see through the chaos

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good morning everyone!! No babble today, here's chapters 15 and 16. Also I've decided that while angts is good, is a little laughter. So I've put a bit of humour in the story just to lighten it up. 
> 
> So enjoy :)

Dread Part 15 

Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters, nor do I intend to profit from them . All rights belong to square Enix

“Gen.”  
At this point cloud realises that genesis has gone and that angeal has gone after him. All of this combined with the whole alfie and his call ordeal has cloud on the verge of a breakdown and rightly so too. 

“Cloud. Whoa hey there it's alright, just breathe it out kid. Angeal will handle genesis.” Zack calm tones tells him, but no matter how much of that is true, the fact remains that in an hour almost everything collapsed on him. Right when he thinks he got a handle on the situation, the wool is pulled over him. 

“Zack. You and kunsel take cloud out of this room. Take him to the main bedroom, play some music or put the T.V on and stay until angeal and genesis return. I will stay and prepare lunch and inform lazard and alfie's JAG regarding this matter, it won't do anyone any favours to have this spring up unannounced. ”  
“Yeah. Ok seph”. And with a nod from both the two second classes to the general, zack and kunsel take cloud to the bedroom to calm him and themselves down and wait for the others return.   
And with an exhausted sigh the general sits and makes some unfortunate yet necessary calls.

 

“Genesis!” Angeal bellowed down the hallway. Sure enough he found the redhead, and judging by the literal fire in both hands, genesis is about to destroy something. Maybe a building. Or possibly two.   
“Calm down, we need you to. Cloud needs you to. He's worried for you gen, it won't help you, your friends or us, you're family if you are charged with reckless behaviour and damages. Come home. Please.” And with a small smile genesis crumbles to the ground, tears in his eyes. Frightened. For the first time in years, truthfully frightened of how he must of appeared in front of them.   
“I'm so, so sorry. I didn't think I just acted and now…. Oh God I've scared cloud, I've scared them all. Angeal i'm so sorry.”  
“Come now gen, my friend, my life. You've done nothing of the sort. The only thing you've done is do what you thought was the best for cloud. He certainly couldn't speak to alfie the way he is now, but you HAVEN'T scared him, if anything he wants you back, he NEEDS you to come back. He's suffered and is still suffering now, please don't add to it. Come home genesis, come back to us. ” And with a uncharacteristically shy nod from genesis and a laugh in response from angeal, genesis was pulled up into a warm hug, a kiss to his temple and a soothing arm around his shoulders as they headed home.   
“Angeal? How mad truthfully is sephiroth? At me?”  
“Oh he's taken more of his share of your anger and rants genesis, this is tame in comparison. Don't worry, seph will forgive you.”  
“Good. Cos I sure as hell ain't gonna kiss his boots for it”  
Laughing full blown now angeal agrees.   
“No. No you won't gen. Nor will we expect you to either.”

It's been nearly an hour since the phone call and subsequently genesis's few choice words bestowed upon an helpless alfie and right now all cloud wants is for all of it to be forgotten. No better yet, he wished for anything and everything he has for any of this to never have happened at all.   
“Cloud. Babe, it's ok gen's coming back. It's ok. It's…   
“NO IT'S NOT ZACK. NONE OF IT IS, JUST STOP SAYING OK CO'S THAT'S NOT GOING TO BRING MY FRIENDS BACK. IT WON'T TAKE THIS NINE INCH SCAR OF MY NECK NOR WILL IT BRING PEACE AND QUIET TO MY FRIENDS LAST SCREAMS IN MY HEAD NOR TO ALFIE.SO PLEASE STOP!!” cloud's had enough. Enough of the earnest sympathy and OKs thrown his way, however he Never meant to take it out on zack and yet he did. 

Today sucked. Period. 

“Zack. I'm sorry I'm so, so sorry i just…”  
“No cloud. Never regret lashing out. Especially to me or any of us. What's going on, what you're dealing with? It's enough to get anyone stressed. So NEVER apologise for your outburst. There will be more so don't ever feel guilty for them ok?” And with that, zack pulls cloud into a hug, placing kisses upon kisses to his temple and settles down on the bed, waiting. Waiting for the two to return. Hopefully in a better mood.   
“You know. I really hope genesis hasn't destroyed the sandwich cart, they have the best BLT'S around ” kunsel says and with a throaty laugh from zack and a giggles from cloud kunsel knows that for now anyways, the drama has ended. 

Well. Until genesis returns that is. 

 

TBC


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Calm before any storms can do everyone wonders

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK here's the second chapter for today. This chapter also contains humour, well my kind anyway but I tried to make it universal in that regards.   
> Hope you enjoy until tomorrow :)

Dread Part 16 

Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters, nor do I intend to profit from them . All rights belong to square Enix

Worry.   
An intense feeling of being sure that a loved one is in distress. A sense that someone you know is in trouble and you want to help, you just don't know how. A feeling that overwrites everything fibre of your being, until you drive yourself insane. Worry is one of those double edged swords. You can't stand it and yet it keeps you human. The feeling that while you take a life or fail to prevent one being taken, worry helps to keep your heart beating. 

And that's exactly what cloud's feeling now.   
It's been twenty five minutes since genesis left and cloud was getting a feeling that may not come back. At least not tonight anyways.   
“Cloud. You okay man?” kunsel breaks through his impending gloomy thoughts.  
“I'm…. Kunsel, do you think gen will come back?”  
“Are you kidding!!, Cloud, genesis loves you. Off course he'll be back. He's probably sulking some place.   
“I sincerely doubt that very much.”  
“GENESIS!!”  
“Shit!!, sir don't do that!!”  
At the moment cloud jumps into genesis's arms, kunsel is trying, though failing to calm his crazy heart down. Seriously all first class SOLDIERS are ghost. Period.   
“I'm so sorry gen. If only I had answered the call then maybe you wouldn't have felt the need to escape. I'm just… gen”  
“My child, you needn't apologise. I overstepped my boundaries and for that i'm sorry. ” Sensing that they would likely go around in circles with their apologies zack chipped in stating it's time for dinner. With a reluctant kunsel saying he has to leave, they bade him a farewell with kunsel promising to call or swing by before the hearing, so the five SOLDIERS prepared for a hearty meal. However one thing remains…..

Upon entering angeal's office, genesis found sephiroth still on the phone, so he reluctantly made his way over.   
“Yes sir. No sir that's not necessary . No sir, third class strife doesn't need a warrant to exclude third class renking from further contact. Yes sir, yes I understand. Very well. Good night to you as well sir. ” And with a hefty sigh sephiroth placed his phone down on the desk.   
“Bureaucracy grating your nerves again?”  
“I assume you have apologised to cloud for your behaviour? ”  
“I have. Sephiroth, I'm not going to apologise for the words spoken but i will apologise on how they were. Forgive me please?”  
However sephiroth said nothing, merely stood, faced genesis and pulled him into a very, very tight hug.   
“Cloud needs us, needs YOU. You cannot act so brash, not until the hearing ends. Cloud doesn't need any more stress. Both physically and emotionally, he is still healing, that's the whole reason we had him discharged from hospital, so he can truly heal without being hassled by the dealings of being a subject to a doctor. For now no more drama, okay genesis? ”  
“Yes sir”  
And with a cheeky response and a kiss to his forehead for genesis, both first classes headed to dinner. 

 

“SERIOUSLY. C'mon man do i REALLY need to go over this again?!?!”  
“Zack, being on leave doesn't mean you cannot educate yourself. You have no valid reason to become lazy ”.  
“Well, what about cloud? How come you're making me study and, and stuff while he gets free cuddles and love and everything else that falls into that category? ”  
“Cloud was shot and almost died. I think it's fair for him to relax don't you agree? Now enough zack, get back to work. Head down. Focus. And study. ”  
“MAAANN, this sucks soo bad”.

Dinner was nice, everyone for once just mellowed without threats hanging over them. And now it was downtime, or as zack would whine “FORCED EDUCATION TIME”. Angeal thought that zack's free time could be spent Wisely and productivity, and so zack started off sulking and such and cloud…..   
Well cloud was doing exactly what zack was sulking about. Presently he was snuggling with genesis, having his hand caressing and massaging his hair while sephiroth's doing the same to his legs.   
Although it wasn't all cosy, cloud was having a question and answer session with sephiroth, a hasty example of what to expect from the hearing.   
“The whole point of this pace is exactly to provide to you what you will expect to feel, anger at being rushed, at being misinterpreted, at being so far pushed into a corner that you will say something you'll regret later. You must remain calm, no matter how flustered you are, feel free to vent, although do it internally. You will have required, mandatory ten minute breaks which kunsel can accompany you with so you have someone to speak with. We are aren't allowed to interact with you over the course of the hearing, the only time will be when we arrive home which will be approximately an hour after you have to ensure that no bias or pressure is imposed. At which case we definitely won't be talking about the hearing. ”  
“Any idea how long it will take? I sincerely doubt that it will be over in a day. Right?”  
“Sadly no. It could take a week, no longer than two. Cloud, will you be able to handle such a, lengthy interrogation so to speak?”  
“Honestly?, I don't know, what I do know is I need answers. At least for my friends, even if not for myself. I have to do this. I have to face this, face alfie. To know if he was stressed or blackmailed or something. I need to know everything that happened. I at least deserve that much. ”  
“Cloud. My child, you deserve that and so much more. But do not pressure yourself to hear everything at once. This is a marathon, not a sprint. Take it slow.”  
“I know. I just… I, i can handle it, NEED to handle this. I don't know if I will return to active duty, not until i know that this, this mess never, ever happens again to anyone. ”  
It was a conversation for another day but since cloud brought it up…   
“Cloud. Have you been given that thought. About your enlistment in SOLDIER?”  
“NO!!, I just wanted to know if i can return to duty, after experiencing that, it won't be safe if I can't handle this. Not for me or my fellow SOLDIERS. I love doing this, despite all the pain. But right now.? I don't know… I'm sorry”   
“No cloud. Never apologise for thinking about your safety and those around you. Know that whatever happens, whatever you decide. We will still love and stand by your side. In SOLDIER and out of it.”  
And with a reassuring smile and hug from both sephiroth and genesis, cloud drifted through to sleep. For once with a small smile on his face. Softly hearing   
“You're valued cloud. In and out of SOLDIER. Never forget that”.

TBC


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is how it started.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi I'm spoiling you all now. I'm going to be losing my Internet soon so im going to post two more now and resume again on the 12. if possible I will start again sooner. This chapter is the reason i, in a way wrote this story, i knew what was going to happen and to who but this one tells the how. So enjoy :)

Dread Part 17 

Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters, nor do I intend to profit from them . All rights belong to square Enix

“Alright men. As of 13:30, a group of twenty to twenty five men have entered the Warehouse district. Carrying a total of five crates, contents unknown. We have orders to observe and if the situation calls for it, eliminate the hostiles without prejudice. Understood? ”  
“YES SIR!!”  
“Very well, we will be in groups of four, each group carrying a medic. I'm not expecting casualties but i'm not taking chances either . We do not know their intentions or motives, however if they have weapons logic dictates they will intend to use them. Most of you here have worked together before, so in that regards I've assembled you accordingly, third classes strife, renking, tarpon and myself will be a squad. We will however not be engaging with the enemy, we're the most silent one's here and as such well will be the scouts. Commander stow will be overseeing the remaining units.”  
“That's fine general”  
“Hmm. Each squad has a commander in charge, regardless all MUST listen and OBEY his orders without preamble or arguing agreed?”  
“YES SIR!!”.  
“Alright men, move out!!! ”

And with that, all members of the reconnaissance and detainment unit headed to their respective trucks and headed for the Warehouse district.   
“General sephiroth sir?, who's in charge of our unit? ” Alfie renking voice spoke up through the hum of the engine.   
“Strife will be, I'm heading over the roofs, from there I can see everything that happens inside the Warehouse as well as taking out any lookouts they have posted around the perimeter. Is that a problem renking?”  
“Oh no, no sir I was merely inquiring that's all. Me and cloud are good friends, we have had each others back before right cloud? ”  
“Uh huh. One of my first missions was with alfie. We're good sir. ”  
“Very well SOLDIERS. Get your gear ready, we're approaching the enemy base. ”  
“Hey cloud, I was wondering how come you're carrying a sniper rifle?” tarpon's almost timid voice breaks through. And it's not surprising really, not only is this his first mission with this particular group of SOLDIERS , but THE general sephiroth is his squad leader. “No offence, but we're SOLDIER and as Far as I'm aware, we don't carry guns.”  
“That's true. But I'm on point, I have a 90% target accuracy rating in firing, i'm not included in the overall raids, i'm on oversight, watching not just the enemy, but us and the other squads as well as the general.”  
And with that, all tarpon can say is…   
“Wow”.  
And with a good natured laugh and pat on the back from Alfie and a small smirk from sephiroth they approached the destination.   
“Alright, renking take flank, tarpon take the front and strife head for the upper floor. ”   
“Yes sir”. And with that the two third headed into the lion's den, leaving cloud and sephiroth entering via a fire exit stationed from the outside.   
“Alright, cloud up first, i doubt they can see us but i'm not risking the light reflecting off your scope.”  
“Ok. And here i thought you just wanted to have a perfect view of my ass”.  
“Well yes, there's that also.”  
And with a small chuckle cloud, followed by sephiroth, made it to the roof.   
“Right strife, you're in charge now, com set to 8 check? ”  
“Com 8 check”.  
“Be careful, keep your head down, eyes sharp, remember you only need one shot to count. Take your time. Breathe before firing ok?”  
“Ok”. And with a kiss they were reluctant to have and break, both got themselves in position. 

It was close to an hour before real movement occurred, all units were in position, each checking in with the others.  
Out of his proverbial vision, cloud saw alfie hitting the upper East corner, watching every angle like a hawk.   
“renking, you're too exposed. Fall back otherwise i won't be able to cover you”, cloud's voice broke through the coms they were wearing.   
“Easy strife, i know what i'm doing. I thought i saw one enemy handing over a grenade to another. I'm checking it out. ”  
“No. Fall back, if that's the case and that goes off, I can't take care of you within the blast radius. Fall back renking. That's an order. ”  
“Strife. Explain what's happening over there. ” Sephiroth demands, he can see almost everything from his corner, already taken out three sentries.   
“Sir. Renking apparently saw a grenade being handed over and is making a pig headed decision to see it up closely. ”  
“It's not “pig headed” cloud, I'm doing my job while you're safety perched up in your coop. ”  
“For your information alfie, i'm trying to keep you and everyone else alive dumbass. Now get back, that's an order!!”  
“I can handle this… ”  
“ENOUGH”, sephiroth hissed through the coms, “Renking, you've been given an order. Follow it. Now. ”  
“But sir..”, and just as he was going to explain his actions, his sword slightly scraped the walls, catching the enemy's attention.   
“Shit. All units alert. Hostels are aware of us. Be ready for combat”. And with cloud's order, the SOLDIER'S took action. While all of this happens, sephiroth approached the front, clearly not impressed by alfie's blatant insubordination but presently unable to do anything about it as of this moment, took care of any that escaped.   
All the while, cloud, being a little stealth monkey that he is made his approach, taking anyone down who approaches with a single, well placed bullet.   
“Alfie!!! What the hell!! look what you started, all of this could've been avoided if you listened, contrary to my appearance I do know what i'm talking about!! Now get your ass back before..”

Cloud never got the chance to finish his sentence as a bullet from an enemy that used a blind spot took him down. 

“SHIT!!!!CLOUD!! TARPON GET OVER HERE NOW!! CLOUD'S BEEN SHOT!!!!”.

In less than two minutes, alfie pulled cloud to cover whilst tarpon came over, for his actions Alfie took a shot to the leg. “Shit, cloud. Can you stay with me?”  
“Cloud!!” worried, tarpon tried to stem the bleeding from both cloud's neck and alfie's thigh, which considering how fast cloud was actually bleeding out, courtesy of a chemical called adrenaline, cloud won't survive much longer unless tarpon had help. 

And help came in the form of silver and black.   
“General Sir!!! Cloud's down and so is Alfie!! ” tarpon called over the sounds of gunfire and blades. 

With so much speed sephiroth approached and he was not happy. Not in the slightest.   
Without theatrics, sephiroth ripped cloud's shirt and tried to stem the blood from cloud but it wasn't enough, not with the limited Space given. He had to make a decision. 

A decision he didn't take lightly. Not at all.

“Tarpon. Move. I'm going to strangle cloud. ”  
“Sir!! You can't!! You'll not only cut off the air supply but also squeeze more blood out of the bullet hole!! Sir please reconsider. If you do this then… ”  
“IF I don't. Cloud will die. End of discussion.. And I won't be squeezing hard, just enough to stop it, just enough to allow you to apply bandages to secure the entry wound . Renking is also bleeding out, I can hold cloud without risk of my hand cramping or more blood loss. Now go! ”  
And with a shaky nod, tarpon stood to attend to Alfie, leaving behind an image of the general's hand gripping cloud's throat like a vice. 

“Cloud? Cloud stay with me ok? Focus on me. On my voice. There you go. Hi there SOLDIER . That's it, stay by my side. ”  
Sure enough cloud opened his eyes, wearily to see sephiroth giving him a small and equally sad and stern smile.   
Cloud tried to return it…. Only to choke on the blood that entered his oesophagus and the grip around his throat, courtesy of sephiroth, of which he didn't understand on why he was literally throttling him and tried weakly to remove the appendage from his neck.   
“No stop cloud. CLOUD!! Enough.” As soon as cloud stopped he continued.   
“Cloud stay calm and focus on me. You have been shot in the neck, judging by the blood you're losing, it has mostly likely nicked a main vein or artery. My grip on your throat is just about the only thing keeping you alive ok? So stay still, breath nice and slowly, I'm not stopping the airflow. ”  
And with a shaky, small, barely there nod, cloud did as he was told. Two minutes later tarpon approached ready to aid the general.   
“Ok, sir on my count move”.  
“I'm ready”.   
“Ok. And. 1,2,3 and move!”  
And with that sephiroth lifted his grip, resulting in arterial spray hitting him and tarpon in the face but that's of little consequence, tarpon managed to secure the wounds the best he could which resulted in a very, very grateful sephiroth taking the weak cloud in arms, securely holding him, he guided him with a hand on the back of cloud's head to his heartbeat for him to focus on.   
“Thank-you tarpon. Now attend to renking and require status as to the other units. ”  
“Of course sir, you're welcome. Just keep cloud conscious, if he loses consciousness he may never wake up. I will return in a few”. And with a nod from the general he headed back to alfie.   
“central control, this is general sephiroth requesting emergency evac, two SOLDIERS critically wounded, one suffering arterial bleeding from the neck. ”  
“understood general. Evac eta three minutes out”.

And with that, sephiroth was left waiting in momentarily silence until he heard a small moan beneath him.   
“My young one, don't fear i’m here and help is coming to get you home.” Sephiroth says soothingly with an anxious smile on his face   
“U,us ho..me you..you mean, rright?”  
“of course cloud. Don't speak anymore, Rest now, however try to stay focused on my voice.”  
Pushing aside sweaty, blood streaked blonde hair, sephiroth gave his forehead a loving, lingering kiss before making a phone call he dreaded.   
“Sephiroth. How is the mission going?, You heading home now? ” Angeal's voice happily coming through. 

“Angeal. Cloud's been shot. I'm not going into Specific details for the time being, however he's been shot in the neck maybe cutting the subclavian or the jugular, call stow for more information, for now alert the others and meet me in the main trauma centre. ”  
“Very well, see you soon. ”  
The helicopter's arrival cut the call off, making the way over, sephiroth placed cloud on the stretcher in the body of the helicopter, strapped cloud and himself in while talking to the on-board doctor, allowing him to give cloud much needed blood and holding his hands. 

Praying for whoevers out there to allow cloud to survive.   
At least this mission anyway. 

TBC


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nightmares doesn't mean you're haunted, it simply means your accepting what's happening.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here's the second chapter until the 12th. I'm not abandoning this I've got eight more written up so as soon as possible i will post them. Probably too late to mention but some of the chapters will follow the one before it. There maybe a time skip but it will only be a day if that in this story. So for now enjoy and I will be back on the 12th, if not sooner. :) take care out there.  
> P.s I apologise for the fast tempo of the chapters also.

Dread Part 18 

Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters, nor do I intend to profit from them . All rights belong to square Enix

It's been almost two weeks since the shooting. A week since the hearing date has been decided. Two days from now, cloud will testify to the board exactly what happened to the squad from all points of view, a standard operation that resulted in so much death.  
But that wasn't the most pressing issue right now. 

Right now cloud is having a nightmare.  
A nightmare he's unaware he's having.  
A nightmare that's jarring his body so badly it's literally tearing his stitching open. One. Suture. At. A. Time. 

The evening went well, after he had fallen asleep in the arms of both sephiroth and genesis, angeal and zack carried on about zack's lack of discipline in regards to education and they had continued to banter with sephiroth and genesis joining in on occasion. But the night was making its presence known and so they headed up to bed with angeal gathering cloud into his arms so the other two could get up. Once cloud was settled, the four first class SOLDIERS prepared for bed themselves, having vacated to angeal's two days ago.  
Angeal's apartment had two main bedrooms and a spare but nonetheless big bedroom on the side. So angeal and zack took one of the main rooms ,while sephiroth and genesis took the other leaving cloud with the spare.  
Now don't get the wrong idea, they wanted nothing more than to have cloud in at least one of the pairs arms, but considering that the last time they were in bed, cloud felt unsettled in genesis's arms when he had a nightmare. So they decided that cloud would sleep relatively better alone. And so the others said their goodnights and sweet dreams to cloud and each other and headed to bed. 

That's when it happened. 

It was around two AM when sephiroth heard what sounded like whimpering coming from cloud's room, ever so gently, sephiroth got up, soothed genesis's moans of complaints and headed to cloud's room. 

It took a mere glance to see that cloud was having a nightmare, however it only took one twitch of the nose for sephiroth to smell blood coming from cloud's otherwise clean, white bandages and dressings around his neck.  
With all the speed he had shown on the mission, sephiroth carefully grabbed hold of cloud, placing him in the same manner he did as when he was shot in his arms and tried to wake him up without delay and hopefully without making the situation worse.  
“Cloud. My young one, you need to wake up. Come on cloud. Return to me.”  
Being so engrossed in trying to wake cloud up, he hadn't noticed zack until he was in the doorway.  
“Seph. What you doing? Is cloud doing ok? ” without looking up towards zack, and still trying to awaken cloud, sephiroth tensley replied.  
“Zack. Get the first aid kit, my phone and angeal quickly. Cloud's having a nightmare and has torn the sutures open”.  
And with a curse and steps like an elephant on the stairs, zack hastily yet calmly did as instructed. 

It took no less than a minute for zack to do what was ordered of him. And now sephiroth had cloud in angeal's arms while calling for the doctor who treated cloud on the phone, calmly giving instructions to a slightly shaken yet in control general.  
Genesis was at the doorway, calming a nervous and worried laden zack who was watching his best friend and lover slowly bleeding out on angeal, whilst trying to calm himself too.  
“Damn it angeal, can't you just, I don't know slap him awake or something? His bleeding too much, it's going through your clothes”.  
“doing that will result in more harm than good pup. This is the only way in which we can ensure that cloud will wake up with less damage then he is in now. ”  
Angeal calmly states, breaking eye contact with cloud just enough to see the tears in and out of zack's eyes and down his face.  
“Genesis. Get zack out of hear.”  
“WHAT?? NO!!, Angeal i'm staying. Cloud needs me!! I'm not abandoning him. I'm… ”  
By the time zack said that last syllable, cloud woke with a start. And once he realised what's happening, he screamed . 

And he Screams loud and hard. 

“Cloud. Kid, calm down, you're bleeding out again, but judging by the extent of it, it's most likely a small vein that has torn away from the subclavian artery that has caused this. Calm down cloud. You're alright, you're in no fear of dying here.”  
Angeal's calming voice and gentle stroking to his hair and the side of his face was all that was needed for cloud to stop, slow his erratic breathing down and clutch onto angeal's sleep pants and cry. All the while angeal is cradling the back of cloud's head with the crook of his elbow and comforting him with one hand while the other he uses to apply gentle but firm pressure on the wound.  
While that's happening, sephiroth returns from the ensuite bathroom with a small frown stating to the others that the doctor will be here in five minutes and while they wait they have to keep cloud conscious.  
“Cloud. Buddy. You.. You okay? ” zack all but sobs the words which is made more prominent when cloud draws wearily blue eyes to him.  
“Yeah. Sorry. For.. For waking you all.. I..”  
“Shh cloud, enough talking, conserve your strength, lay your head down on my neck and stay still kid”. And with a firm kiss to his temple from angeal, cloud does as he's told. Like a good SOLDIER is supposed to.  
“Zack. Come with me, I need help to make some tea and we need to bring back a wash bowl and clean clothes for cloud and angeal. Come now babe, let's go. ” Genesis mutters into zack's hair and with a sad smile zack leaves to help with the chores stated.  
“Sephiroth. I think we need to schedule the appointment for cloud to see a psychologist as we agreed to do.”  
While they were making their way to cloud in the hospital, the doctor recommended cloud to see a shrink, and judging by tonight's actions, he was correct in doing so.  
“Agreed. However not right now, cloud will not have the time nor frame of mind to do so as his hearing is in less than a day's time. He will be stressed enough as it is having to relive this to a whole group of strangers, nethermind doing it twice. For now he will talk with us. Then we will arrange a time for the psychological Eval. ”  
“Agreed. For now, one thing at a time.”

In the kitchen, genesis is boiling the kettle while placing tea bags into each cup, stopping only to see zack on the island seat, mourning what could've been.  
“Puppy. Come here”  
Zack all but ran into genesis's arms, weeping for not just what had occurred, but knowing that this could very well happen again.  
“It's not fair gen, he's suffering. He's suffering so, so much he may as well be better off dead. He can't sleep without reliving everything and having this, Tthis crap happen. It's not ffair, it's not. ”  
Zack's hiccup liden words filtered through the din.  
“I know, however. Cloud survived because he chose life, a life with us. And as his life, his loves we must be strong when he's unable to be. Puppy don't despair, he is still with us. ” A calm conversation from a fiery redhead, oh how ironic . But netheless it did what it set out to do. And for now, that's enough. 

Twenty minutes later, the doctor came and went. As suspected by angeal, the wound was indeed a small, torn vein that had ripped, giving cloud a minor anesthesia, the doctor re did the sutures for the wound, cleaned it up and changed the dressings and helped sephiroth clean up cloud, while all of that took place angeal went to take a shower to clean up cloud's blood, while he loves the kid dearly, there was only so much you share and keep of someone. 

Being covered in the blood of a loved one? Too much.

Upon his return he found genesis holding a freshly clean cloud and helping him drink his tea, with zack and sephiroth sitting by their feet. 

“The doctor left, the damage was minor however it could happen again, he's given us a sedative that should only be used if absolutely necessary to do so. The doctor also says that cloud probably has PTSD, and until that has been confirmed he should have someone here to sleep with at all times until he recovers from the gunshot wound. The sedative should be given once he's been referred to a psychologist.” Sephiroth informs angeal on what he's missed during his shower. 

“Cloud. My child. Talk to us, to me. What's going on in that beautiful head of yours?”  
“I. I don't even know, I was fine, tonight i felt good, and… and all i Remember before I feel asleep is you guys telling me that you'll support my decision regarding SOLDIER, and next thing i'm aware of is this. I promise i’m not being difficult and I would talk to you but i REALLY don't remember. Please, please believe me please.. ”  
“Cloud. My baby, relax. We believe you. You're in a state of shock, it's not surprising really that you don't recall this. For now let us sleep. Tomorrow the hearing begins.”  
“Stay. Genesis? please, can you all stay. I don't want to be alone?”  
“Me and genesis will cloud. We don't want to smother you.”  
“But.. ”  
“Hey it's alright cloud. Me and angeal will be right next door ok?” zack informs cloud with a strong yet gentle grip on his calf.  
“Ok”.  
With that conversation taken care of, zack and angeal said their goodnights again and headed to bed, setting cloud upon genesis, sephiroth turned off the main light, placed the covers over them and fell to sleep, wishing the pair a safe and sound dreams to capture them. 

“Good night my child. I love you so, so much. Wake me if you need anything, anything at all.  
“I will. Night gen. I love you too.”  
“night seph”  
“night sephiroth”  
“love you”  
“love you”  
“Good night young one, genesis. I love you too also.”

TBC


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Face all that bothers you head on. It's the only way to move forward.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!! I've got the Internet for now, so I'm gonna post two more today. I didn't want to drag this out, so I've pushed up the story a little, it's still going to be thirty chapters long but i'm not dragging my heels to get there. So enjoy :)

Dread Part 19 

Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters, nor do I intend to profit from them . All rights belong to square Enix

“Could please for the record state your name, rank and I'd number please ”.

“Cloud strife. SOLDIER third class. I'd number 258 - 714 - 01211.”  
“Very well. Thank-you third class strife”.

Here it was. The hearing to determine what had caused all of this to pass.   
And cloud already hated it. The board were stuffed with Democrats who knew nothing of warfare and with SOLDIERS that did. All of the SOLDIERS were in ceremonial clothes, each with their medals and rank of service on display.   
Even sephiroth, genesis and angeal were dressed up for the occasion. Zack also, though clearly not as impressive as the others but still, impressive all the same.   
Cloud was dressed to, although he opted for a suit and tie instead.   
“Mr strife. How did, from your standpoint. How did third class renking act?”  
And here it is.   
Fear and self loathing. For himself and alfie.   
“third class renking acted as a SOLDIER should. Up until I ordered him to stand down. ”  
“Why? I mean, if what you said is true. Then why did you stop renking from doing his duty? Why didn't you allow him to take action? Knowing that renking could've very well have ended any and all conflicts right there and then. Third class strife, why did you ask third class renking to stand down? Did you perhaps want the glory of handling the situation yourself? ”

“Oh you've gotta be kidding me...”  
“Quiet zack.”

“I asked renking to stand down as he was lacking cover. If what he claimed to see was real, then from my position as well as his own I wouldn't have been able to cover him to the best of my ability. ”  
“Really? Tell me third class strife, how come you weren't on the ground also? It seems to me that maybe you were more concerned with your own hind than that of your unit. So where were you when the guns were fired? When you're buddies were killed left, right and centre? Where were you?!! ”

It was too much.   
All of it.   
The accusations.   
The blame.   
Maybe alfie's JAG had a point.   
He should of been on the ground also…. 

“Third class strife. I asked you a question. Where were you? ”  
“Seph. Help him. He's in pain,  
it's too much, it's overwhelming him. ”  
“Unfortunately i can't. It's not in my permit to do so. I'm sorry zack.”

“Ahem”. “I. I was on oversight. My duty was to oversee the whole Warehouse, not just one man. I had a better chance of ensuring victory and survival of the men and Misson up in the rafters than on the ground, as you put it. Sir. ”  
Cloud barely answered before the onslaught of tears and emotions took hold. 

Then again, he may have spoken too soon.  
“Third class strife. Did you or did you not verify the situation? Did you confirm through the scope of your gun the status of the enemy? Perhaps if you did then my client's actions would be praised not criticised!! tell me third class strife, why did you not only halt my clients actions but never took it into consideration? Well explain yourself! ”  
“Excuse me for the interruption. It's my understanding that third class strife is here for a review, not a cross examination of his actions. He's not in a trial, none of the two SOLDIERS are in fact. ”  
“Agreed general sephiroth sir, please retract the Last line of questioning. I apologise Mr strife, We'll take recess now. ”  
And with the head judge's order, chairs were scraped across wooden floors, the hearing went into a break.   
“Cloud. Hey man come with me yeah? Let's get some air. ” Cloud was so out of it, he didn't hear kunsel approaching, nor did he feel being taken by the hands outside either. 

Nor did he see four pairs of worried eyes following their actions either. 

“I. I need it off. I need to breathe. ”  
“Easy cloud. Hang on there i'll help you get your tie off, relax you may tear your dressings.”  
Sure enough cloud was struggling to remove his tie. The way he was acting you would rightly think he was in a noose.

Although you couldn't blame him.   
They were all but hanging cloud, not questioning him. 

“there we go buddy. Just relax I've got you. ” Once he removed cloud's tie, he guided the pair to a table, handing over a drink and just relax for a little. 

“You're doing great cloud, I know that was intense but you really are handling it.  
Alfie's JAG is hard though huh?”  
“You got that right. He pulls no punches.   
It's almost like….”  
“Cloud.”  
Both cloud and kunsel froze. They were definitely didn't expect him, least of all right now.. DEFINITELY not now.  
“Alfie?… alfie, wwhat, what are you doing here”  
“YES alfie. What ARE you doing here.”  
Kunsel all but shielded cloud.   
Under no circumstances can these two parties meet, not until the hearing ends.   
“I know. I know i can't be here. I just needed to let cloud know. Cloud. I didn't ask my JAG to say that to you, none of that. I, i just…”  
“Renking”   
At the sound of sephiroth's voice all three stopped. Dead.  
“You should not be here. The whole point of this is to allow a non biased Opinion, as I'm sure I told you on the phone correct?”  
“Yes sir.”  
“Very well. You will return to the hearing room now.”  
And with that, Alfie was guided by sephiroth back to the hearing room. With a small nod of acknowledgement to the pair, sephiroth headed back inside shutting the door behind him, leaving the two behind. Alone. Again.   
“I. This madness needs to end. I can't do this, not anymore.”  
“I know cloud. C'mon drink up, round two is about to start soon.”  
And with a shaky nod cloud drank away his problems, figuratively and literally speaking that is. Though without the booze, sadly. 

“third class strife. At approximately 14:15 third class renking engaged the enemy. What prompted this course of action?”  
This time the head judge started this round off. 

“third class renking stated that he saw a grenade being handed over and decided to investigate. I told him to stand down, from there he argued that he could see and handle the situation, once general sephiroth stepped into the conversation, renking tried to fall back. However his sword caught the side of the crate. And that point the enemy's attention was drawn to him, at which the gunfight ensued.”  
“Do you know why renking didn't listen to you and yet listen to general sephiroth? Could he perhaps sought to undermine your command?  
“Honestly sir? Both myself and renking have worked together before this mission, neither of us were in command then. I could only summarise that the change between comrade and commander was a big step that couldn't be overlooked.   
Although, I doubt anyone would undermine general sephiroth sir.”

With a small chuckle from the head judge and a smirk from the four SOLDIERS in attendance the judge agreed. 

“No. No i don't think any would disobey the general. Third class strife, i will apologise in advance for any discomfort caused, but do you know of the casualty list and if so, do you think the deaths could've been avoided if third class renking acted on your commands?”

“Seph, does cloud know? Does he know of how many have died?”  
“Angeal. I dare not say he doesn't. I'm sure kunsel has informed him.”  
Uncharacteristically angeal replied   
“Shit. He's going to need us when we return home.”  
“Yes he will, although he already has us.”  
“I. I was informed that half of the unit were killed. Some on the scene, others enroute to the hospital. As to your other question? No sir. I don't think regardless of renking's actions on that day that my, the units i was with could've been saved. As my general Said “logic dictates that if the enemy has weapons they intend to use them.” regardless of any action taken, there was always a possibility of being spotted one way or another and that we all could've been wiped out.”

“Third class strife, do you put blame for the Warehouse mission, it's casualties and your own injuries on third class renking?”

And here it is. The one question he was  
dreading out of all asked today. 

“Sephiroth. He can't do this, he can't dictate whether all of those lives could of been saved. It wasn't his job.. That's..”  
“Genesis. That's a very valid line of questioning.”  
“Valid my ass, that's not fair on cloud.”  
“Maybe genesis. However it does beg the question on renking's actions.”  
“Third class strife? Are you well enough to answer my question? Please take your time.”  
“Wow. Atleast he's giving cloud time, instead of that slave driver excuse of a JAG”.  
“Zack. Stop.”

“I. I don't want to put blame on renking.. He. He's a good SOLDIER, still is, despite his actions. I can't say without doubt that the situation just got a hold on him, nor can I say that if I maybe have incapacitated renking then maybe the ensuing gunfire wouldn't have happened. As to my injury, I was shot because i went to renking's side, action I said earlier was my job. To ensure the safety and success of the mission and the men on it. That i can say without a shadow of a doubt, I don't blame him for. Never did and never will.”  
“That's very noble and sincere words to be spoken Mr strife. The resulting injuries sustained by yourself and the rest of the unit were caused by an experimental form of ammunition, and as such the enhancements of SOLDIERS could not nor did they have any chance of surviving.”  
“Mr strife, the deaths of the men in the unit were unavoidable in the gunfight that had occurred, let that give comfort to you. We will adjourn the hearing. In light of the developments made today. The facts remains that third class renking committed insubordination which will be answered for. However Mr strife's testimony has stated that he puts no blame, merely on himself. This hearing is finished. We will return for an overall review but testimony is herby over”.

And with that air of formality. This stage of cloud's nightmares has ended.   
For now at least, cloud won, a hollow victory but a victory nonetheless.   
Now all he must face is the verdict to alfie's enlistment and his own memory. 

TBC


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Take each minute, hour and a day at a time, you'll get there eventually.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here's the second chapter for today. There is some humour in this, we'll I found it funny so I hope you guys do.  
> Like stated on the previous chapter I'm pushing the story forward, just it pace but i'm not rushing it so don't fret i do know how it's going.  
> So enjoy until the twelfth. I hope ;  
> Ps although very late to say but Thank-you to cocosnest3 and others who left kudos on this it's very appreciated!!!

Dread Part 20 

Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters, nor do I intend to profit from them . All rights belong to square Enix

It was a sombre drive back to angeal's apartment, each in their own private world.  
Sephiroth, genesis, angeal and zack took heart that the hearing wouldn't drag on for either cloud or alfie, however that doesn't change the fact that the mission was supposed to be a simple, standard operation, and right now all they could think of it is being anything but a disaster. Fact. 

It hurt to see cloud leave without them, leaning gently on kunsel who had an arm around his shoulders. The young man looked as if he had the whole world on his shoulders. He looked defeated, guilt ridden and over all sad. Sad and alone. 

They arrived to see cloud spaced out on the couch, staring at everything and nothing all at once, in the kitchen they could hear kunsel making a cup of tea. Deciding this needs a gentle touch angeal approached the man on the couch while the other three made their way to the kitchen to make there own as well as starting lunch and seeing how kunsel's was doing. 

“Cloud. How are you holding up kid?”  
“Cloud?”  
As soon as angeal saw cloud's face as to why he wasn't responding, right away he knew.  
Cloud was seeing ghost that were haunting him, ghost only he could see and fight. Eventually angeal managed to get through.  
“Angeal? Sorry. I'm. I'm not doing so good. I'm trying to make sense of it but. But it's… it's..”  
Without delay angeal gathered cloud into his arms and directed his head beneath his chin softly and silenced him. Today was a lot to handle, even more so when he geared himself up for a marathon and in the end it turned out to be a short run. If it even could be called that.  
“I know cloud. I do, it's over for now. Try and relax for now, there's a lot going on in your head right now. But cloud, it's over for now. Sleep, at the very least try to do so. Let today leave your mind.”  
Slowly cloud did as he was instructed to do, slowly angeal felt cloud's stiff shoulders go lax, his head sliding down to rest on his chest and legs lifted up to lay beside himself. Easing cloud down to his lap, angeal grabbed a pillow, laid cloud's head upon it, took his suit jacket and shoes off and placed a blanket over the tired young man.  
.  
All the while a different conversation was taking place in the kitchen.  
“Kunsel. Man, thanks so, so much for being there for cloud when we couldn't.”  
Zack threw himself to the fellow second class. Kunsel, who was used to such behaviour merely embraced the man with an easy smile and responded.  
“You're very welcome. I'm glad it's finished for now. Any idea when and what the overall verdict will be?”  
“Unfortunately no, this is a serious problem that had occurred. And while they will take into account what cloud has said. The fact remains that renking's disregard for orders resulted in fatalities. As well as hospitalisation for most. For now, let us rejoice that this, for the time being has ended.”  
With sephiroth's words and nods all round, with lunch in hand the group of men headed to the living room. 

“Sephiroth. When will we book cloud in for a psychologist appointment?”

It's been nearly half an hour since they returned from the hearing and were in a relatively state of peace, and so angeal sought no reason to delay another part of cloud's recovery.  
“I have spoken to Dr coband, she has already booked cloud in. She will be here tomorrow morning around 0900. There is no use in stressing cloud further or delaying what is necessary. Dr coband is a decent lady who i have no problem with. I hope that this is okay with you, seeing as this is your apartment after all?”  
Laughing softly angeal responded “Sephiroth, I've never been fond of bringing work home with me. However seeing as this vital to cloud's well being I have no rejection to it. If anything I'm glad it's happening now while than later.”

Genesis, who so far has been silent since returning had a point he wanted to address. “I agree that this is necessary, I was the first to mention that we would see to it that cloud will speak to someone. However, look at him, and I mean LOOK at him sephiroth. My child is stressed, he had a nightmare that was so bad he ripped his damn throat open again. Sooner is better than later I agree but twenty four hours? That's too much.”  
“WHAT?” what do you mean cloud ripped his throat open.”

Right. They forgot to mention this to kunsel. Oops. 

“It's fine kunsel. Honestly, he had a nightmare, we were able to handle it, he merely ripped a vein that had unattached itself. He's fine.” Angeal calmly states to a frantic looking kunsel and shooting a stern and all to deserving glare at genesis, who pointedly ignored it.  
“Genesis. I'm not having a fight with you over this. The doctor will be coming, however cloud will decide and only him if he so wishes to speak to her. If anything she will merely be keeping him company. Since the hearing has been officially declared over, our leave ends. We will be doing missions however they are local, lazard has assured that is the case.”  
“He can't be serious. Seph, C’mon man, we need to be here for cloud. He needs Us… He…”

“Zack. we are SOLDIER. It's what we do, it's what you do. I'm not going anywhere and I think i can handle seeing a doctor who plays with people's heads”.  
Cloud's softly, sleep heavy words broke through an impending fight.  
“Cloud. Are you sure of this? I never meant to go over you in this respect .”  
“It's fine seph. Really” cloud eases out of his position, instead of lying he snuggles to angeal who promptly laughed, wrapped an arm around his shoulders and kiss his temple while stroking his hair.  
“Cloud. Have you made a decision regarding SOLDIER and your position then?” zack asks, almost timidly, while he wants nothing more for cloud to stay, he also knows that it's been a tough time for cloud too. And sometimes the best thing to do is to start over.  
“I'm staying. Saying what i did to the board regarding my job, I realised that i have to take the bad that comes with the territory of this line of work.”  
Zack all but cheered and laughed at that moment, grabbing kunsel who was just as happy with the news. Sephiroth, genesis and angeal, although happy for the young man, chose a smaller, more calmer version of celebration of the news given.  
“Very good, my child. In that case i will be looking forward to working with you again.”  
“I think me and sephiroth can agree that we welcome your return SOLDIER third class strife.”  
“Indeed i do. Welcome back SOLDIER”.  
“Thank-you sirs”

“It's great to be back.”

TBC.


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A friendly face can work all kinds of miracles.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back!!! Albeit temporarily, i'm going to post up four chapters today and then the finale some time this week. Thanks so, so much for all that took their time to give this a look. I will probably do some one shots for this fandom and others also. I'm not going to dissappear to the ether of the world.   
> Soo enjoy :)

Dread Part 21 

Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters, nor do I intend to profit from them . All rights belong to square Enix

At 0900 sharp, a knock was heard coming from the apartment's door. Angeal, who had chosen to stay while the others headed back to duty placed down his cup of coffee and took no more than six steps to answer the door. 

“Commander hewley? Hi, Good morning I'm Dr coband. I'm here to see third class strife, if that's ok with you that is?”  
On first impressions, Dr coband was a charming young lady, with cherry red hair tied up in a simple yet sophisticated locking pony tail, with her glasses hanging out from her shirt, perched between her blouse buttons at the front. Paired with skinny jeans and pumps she radiated normalcy, not superiority. And that made lot of difference, especially when they were anxious for cloud as well as themselves.   
“Yes. Good morning, please come in”. Stepping back to allow the lady in, he really noticed how much friendliness and genuine love, enthusiasm and care she had for her job and her clients. When you work for a giant like shinra, you get to see real quick who cares for the wellbeing of people or who cares for the Bucks that enters the bank account. And based on first impressions, angeal can safely and confidently say it's the latter. Hands down.   
“Cloud is just getting ready at the moment, please may i get you a cup of tea or coffee, maybe something to eat?”  
“Oh Thank-you, erm tea two sugars and some toast if that's fine, that is? I don't want to put you out”.  
“That not an issue here, believe me, please take a seat i'll bring it over”. And with a grateful nod and smile Dr coband made her way to the couch. 

Ten minutes later, angeal approached the Dr and handed over her breakfast which she gratefully accepted.   
“I'm going to cut to the chase here, you deserve that much. I'm not here to observe cloud today nor will i be jotting down notes all secretly-like at all, today i merely want to get to know him and for him to do the same. Cloud has been through a lot recently, on top of the hearing, i don't need to put any unnecessary stress on top of it, so if that's ok with you i’m just going to hang out with him today. We'll talk if he wants to, I wouldn't force him to do so. I just felt that you deserve to what i'm going to be doing today.”  
“thank-you. Cloud's doing well truthfully, he's not shying away from all that's happened. However he did suffer a nightmare that resulted in him ripping the sutures open in his throat. So far he's sleeping relatively better now although he does occasionally have bad nights, although fortunately there not that extreme. I do believe he needs a fresh pair of ears to speak to, so to speak.”  
“Well then. I shall do my best. If today goes well, if it's fine with you and the others, can i maybe carry out our chats here and around the other's apartments, comforting and familiar surroundings helps to relax those i see?”  
“Off course. You're welcome over anytime. If you excuse me, cloud should be ready. I'll retrieve him for you”.  
“Please. There's no rush. I can wait until he's ready. However if you want to check on him, by all means, please do.”  
And with a smile angeal excused himself to check on his young charge. 

Upon entering the room, he found cloud sitting by the window on top of the cushions stationed around him, gazing outside wearing a black t.shirt and grey tracksuit bottoms. He looked completely lost and yet content at the same time.   
“Kid. You'll catch a cold sitting with the window open. You're immune system isn't up to top notch yet.” With that angeal makes his presence known, grabbing a baby blue wooly blanket he gifted to cloud, he walked over and placed it around his shoulders. Nestling behind cloud, he pulled him closer while putting the open window onto the latch.   
“Cloud. Dr coband is here. She seems to me to be a very lovely young lady who genuinely wants to help you. Are you ready to say hello?”. Angeal softly speaks into cloud's ear, caressing his hair and planting feather light kisses upon his temple.  
“Yeah. I'm ready, i heard you guys talking. She seems nice to me. What am i supposed to say though? I'm such a mess in my own head, how am i supposed to get that across to someone?” “Angeal? I don't know what to say”.  
Pulling him into a hug angeal merely replies. “Say exactly what you just said cloud. There's no right or wrong way to do this. Speak freely, Dr coband isn't here to judge, only to listen”.  
With a shaky nod cloud gets up, giving angeal a warm hug and kiss which is returned without delay, grabbing the blanket, he goes to meet the doctor who will be keeping him company for the next few hours. 

“Hello cloud, it's to meet you I'm Dr coband.” Sure enough angeal was right, she genuinely seemed to care. So cloud took the plunge.   
“Hi. I'm sorry, i really don't what to say or do any of this to be honest”. “I'm so sorry i..” Sensing that cloud was on the verge of a breakdown angeal approached but surprisingly Dr coband got there first. Hugging the man she took control of the situation. “Hey it's alright cloud, there's no pressure or time limit in place. Me and you?, We're just going to hang out today, i will tell you all about me, how long I've lived here and My childhood. Basically you're getting to know me. That's all. When and only when you're ready, we will discuss you ok? And when you return to active duty, if you still want to, i'll still come and see you. So for now, sit down with me, trust me, I can talk till the cows come home and then some.”  
Softly laughing cloud replied “By any chance, do you know zack? I don't think anyone can match him in those stakes”  
Laughing herself Dr coband responded   
“Oh mister. He and you are so on. I'm up to that challenge.”  
With a groan from angeal saying “Please one puppy is enough Thank-you” And a laugh all round from the trio, the doctor along with cloud made themselves at home while angeal prepared for duty.   
Saying his goodbyes, angeal left.   
Knowing that while cloud is alone with a stranger.   
He will be alright.   
After all, birds eventually have to leave their nest. 

TBC


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes a stressful conversation doesn't need to be one.

Dread Part 22 

Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters, nor do I intend to profit from them . All rights belong to square Enix

“So. Hit me, ask me anything you like.”

It was close to half an hour since angeal left, giving cloud enough time to just breathe and relax in the company of a stranger, really he had no problems with the doctor, if anything it felt like chatting to zack. All the familiarity eased any remaining stress he felt and soon he just went with the flow.   
Ok. I feel kinda weird saying “Dr” or “miss” or even “Mrs coband”, so i guess my first question is what's your name? Of which you don't have to answer, offcourse. Sorry that's rude of me. Forget i said that?”  
Laughing softly the good doctor replied “It's all good cloud, honest. That's how we're going to do this so no need to apologise any more, and my name’s Alex,  
Alex jaden coband. It's a pleasure to   
meet you” smiling back to her, cloud raised his hand in a sign to shake which Alex took and responded “Hello Alex my name's cloud, and it's nice to meet you too.”

And so there unorthodox session began.   
“So. I'm not from midgar, originally i’m from Costa del sol. I came to midgar to get a change of pace. Now don't get me wrong, I've love the sun, but it's lulls you in, never let's go and finally you will become nothing else but sun tanned and lazy. People need to explore, see new things and so i left paradise for metal and i've never looked back.” “What? Why you looking at me like i’m mad?” Sure enough cloud was indeed looking bamboozled by what alex had just told him.   
“I'm sorry. But you swapped sunshine for metal?!! That's really weird!!” and in a fit of laughter cloud didn't even bother to try and explain himself.   
“I have you know that there's nothing weird about me!! I just needed a change”.  
“Well you certainly got one!!” cloud kept going until he felt a spasm in his neck, probably his sutures letting him know he needed to calm down, just a bit.   
Hearing and seeing cloud wince, alex eased cloud out of his laughter and helped relax his neck.   
“Easy cloud, you're ok, probably not the best idea of ours , you know?, trying to kill a client of mine off. Sorry”.  
“It's ok, sorry i never meant to ruin our conversation”.  
“Hey. The only thing ruined here was merely the start of it. From now on we are gonna carry on like this, we'll just be careful is all”. And with a nod and smile cloud and alex leaned back and chatted away. Unimportant things but important in their own way. 

“Cloud!!! I'm back!!” and there was zack. Really the guy had no sense of decorum. 

Well, not when he didn't need it anyway.   
“Hey, we're in here”. Sure enough cloud and alex were all cosy looking on the couch, both had legs tucked under them,alex taking her pumps off long ago.   
“Well i guess i missed out on the fun huh? Do i even want to know if you did anything productive today kid?” in mock authority he added“Do I need to tell angeal about this?”  
Snorting cloud replied “The only ones who needs a lecture on productivity is you zack. Oh which reminds me, alex meet zack fair, zack this is my head doctor, Dr coband”.  
“Heya, nice to meet ya. So be honest doc. Does cloud need to have his dna tested? His hair awfully looks like a chocobo?”  
“ZACK!!”  
Laughing, alex replys “Now that you mention it, you really do look like one cloud.” “And it's a pleasure to meet you too, but please call me alex”. “Will do”. And all the while, gritting his teeth cloud playfully glares at the pair “If you two are ganging up on me, it's war”. And with the two pretend to coo over cloud, the three relax and enjoy the company their in.

Four hours later genesis and angeal arrived and they were pleasantly pleased by what they saw.   
Cloud was snuggling with Zack while having a lively and animated conversation with Alex, zack, who was pitching in when necessary was merely content with relaxing and massaging cloud's head, playing with strands of his hair along the way.   
“That's not true zack!! Take that back!!”  
“Aww but cloud, that's why it's interesting, cos it's true. Well to some extent anyways, mostly he threw the mixture up i stood on guard”.  
“LIAR!!”  
Laughing like a hyena, alex became aware of the other SOLDIERS in the room and made to stand. Genesis,who was more than relieved to see cloud looking so much more alive halted her actions with a wave of the hand and a smile.   
“So, i take it you had a good day my child?”  
“Gen! Hey. Oh alex that redhead is genesis rhapsodos and you meet angeal earlier.”  
“Excuse me, “That redhead ”? You're in for it now.”  
“Alex? First name basis now are we cloud?” Genesis and Angeal commented good humouredly.  
They were glad. More than grateful that cloud's cheeky side has remained in tact and returned. That's what makes cloud, well “Cloud”.  
“Wow look at the time. Cloud, sorry i must be off, but I'll drop by the same time tomorrow deal?”  
“Deal. And Thank-you. So much”  
“You're most certainly welcome. Well zack until next time, oh and i'll collect your debt too. Sirs it was a pleasure to meet you both.”  
“Yeah Yeah, i'll have it tomorrow. Take care Al”.”  
“Come. I'll show you out” And being the gent that he is angeal showed alex to the door. Leaving genesis to snuggle up with the pair. 

“I will be back same time as today. Mr hewley, cloud is a strong individual, he just needs time. With some more sessions he will be fit for duty, however i don't know how well he'll be until we get to the grit of it, that and the results of the hearing, but rest assured. Cloud's a tough man, he'll pull through ok”.  
“Thank-you, that's all the confirmation i need. See you tomorrow”. And with that both bid the other goodnight.   
That just left one thing….. 

 

“Zack? What did the doctor mean by “debt”?” And That set cloud off laughing again with zack sputtering how he betted he could talk more than alex. 

Which he lost. His debt? A case of Costa beer. Yeah, everything was returning to normal. Now they just needed sephiroth to return.   
Normalcy truly is a sight to behold. 

TBC


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Familiarity can do all the power of good when applied correctly and in equal proportions.

Dread Part 23 

 

Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters, nor do I intend to profit from them . All rights belong to square Enix

“It was a standard operation, right from the entry to the Warehouse, to getting into position. Everything was fine, and then….Then it all went to hell. Before i knew it, a fight had ensued and i was shot, it all happened so, so fast. I, i'm still not sure how i even managed to survive.”

It was 0900, Tuesday morning, as promised alex coband returned, only this time she brought some Costa style pancakes and tea for the pair.   
Instead of beating around the bush, once they did they're greetings, cloud decided to jump into it, head on. 

“I know from the debrief that general sephiroth was there and that he came to your side when you went down. Are you aware of this?”  
“Yeah, i mean i saw seph and i was aware that he picked me up and had me in his arms, but after that? It's all blank”.  
“That's right. Cloud, i have access to the reports of the mission, if you like, would you like to see it?”  
“No. It's fine, i know what happened, there's no black spots in-between my head, I guess…. I guess that i'm still in the process of believing that it happened, i survived. All of it, really.”  
“That's understandable cloud, what you're experiencing? It's what's known as survivors guilt. That feeling will come to pass, it's going to take time but it will fade away. Were you friends with any of the men stationed in the unit on the mission?”  
“No. Other than alfie i didn't know the others. I guess that's what's worse huh? The fact i didn't know them.. And now? I'll never will. I can still remember their voices, when they were given status reports, i can recall the anxiety, there hasten actions, there orders. Everything”.  
At that point, alex, who was sitting by cloud's side made her way closer to him, grabbing some tissue, she wiped the tears that were falling, unaware of them to cloud who stiffened at the action then eased into it.   
“Cloud. Their actions are what you expect of SOLDIERS. There trained in combat and warfare tactics, this may not be comforting but those men? They did their duties that day and they went down fighting. Cloud, please do not pity the dead, know that they died with dignity and respect for their jobs, each other and for you also. Know that while their lives had been sadly cut short, know that they had no regrets. None of going into fight.”  
Finishing that train of conversation, alex tipped cloud's face to her, with a gentle touch to his cheek she concluded “In order to live a life with battles, you need to accept that you are all warriors. And all warriors have a fighting spirit and a human heart”. And with those philosophical words in mind, cloud grieved for the warriors he had the honour and privilege to fight beside. 

The session was although short, a real kicker to cloud. He accepted the fact that this is what they all do. As much as it pains him, the fact remains that this could happen to any of his lover's, he could very well be left alone here. But alex's word resonated in him, and while it's a grim reminder, it's strangely comforting to know that all of them would fight just as hard as they can to return to the others. And should they fail? At least they gave death it's run for it's money. 

“Dr coband. Good afternoon.” Sephiroth made his appearance, an action that scared the hell out of alex who jumped, although not so badly it didn't awake cloud who had cried himself to sleep, though it wasn't a bad thing, they didn't have to worry either.   
Silently chuckling at the reaction he received, sephiroth approached the pair, took his coat of, fortunately for alex he had a standard SOLDIER top on, placing his sword and coat on the opposite couch he sat by the pair, gently lifting cloud and placing him on his lap who immediately snuggled into sephiroth. “Good afternoon sir, i trust your day went well?”  
“As Well as it could be. Did you two make progress today?”  
Smiling alex responded “Cloud has improved, he's acknowledged that he was not to blame, although still grieving, he is safe to return to active duty, and while i think he should take some time to heal, both physically and emotionally, he will most likely return once he's given the go-ahead by the doctor. He's ready to work general, but please consider only light work if you allow him to take missions. While he can handle this, i don't believe sending him to a war zone is the best thing to do.”  
“Indeed. I have no intention to send cloud away, if anything he will be stationed close by. However i do appreciate your words and will take them to account. Will cloud still be seeing you”  
“Yep!!! We have made arrangements to speak when he needs to, also personally if you are ok with it, we will be seeing more of each other, zack included. They are both very lovely young men. Don't worry about me poaching them from you. I'm married”.  
Laughing, sephiroth agreed “Yes. They certainly are. You are more than welcome back anytime, you're one doctor i actually like.” Laughing alex agreed, only if sephiroth called her by her name.  
He was more than willing to do so. 

It was close to ten in the evening by the time zack, genesis and angeal arrived back home. Off course zack being who he is made his debut first.   
“Hey Al how you doing?”  
“Very well zack. Better now i see a case of Costa beer in your grasp”.  
“You know, you're lucky i didn't get a knock to the noggin, otherwise This will never get to you”.  
And just as alex was about to respond, genesis cutted in.  
“Puppy. Not even you running head first into a wall could do damage to your head, let alone your memory.” At that, alex laughed to the point of tears.   
And if sensing zack was about to blow up on genesis, angeal silenced him with a hand across his gob and sternly told him off.   
“Zack. You want to fight genesis? Take it outside, in case you two hadn't noticed, cloud is sleeping right in front of you. I will not have the pair of you roughhousing in here. Is that clear?”  
And with a mumbled “Yeah angeal i'm sorry” from zack, and a smug look of agreement from genesis, angeal let him go. which at that point, zack then made his way to the kitchen, not however before giving genesis the middle finger which in turn, pissed genesis off and followed zack who he demanded an apology from a, how he put it? “spoilt puppy who needs to spend time outside in the cold to learn discipline”.  
Sighing, angeal greeted the trio, kissing sephiroth and stroking the hair out of cloud's forehead and and placed a lingering kiss there also.   
Turning his attention to alex he spoke.   
“Good evening alex. My apologies for zack, he is rather… boisterous at times although completely harmless. He tends not to see things before acting.”  
Laughing alex agreed “It's fine. He means well, that's all that matters.”  
“IF only you were more often good doctor. Zack would behave more” Ahh, that would be genesis getting his two cents in. Rolling his eyes angeal said, “Ignore the pair. Would you care to stay for dinner?”  
“Thank-you. I'll take you up on the offer.”  
And with a smile angeal headed to the kitchen, one to prepare dinner. And also to make sure genesis didn't kill the puppy.   
Life truly was getting better. One step at a time. 

TBC


	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We all need to be accountable for all actions. Both professionally and privately

Dread Part 24 

Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters, nor do I intend to profit from them . All rights belong to square Enix

It's been two weeks since the hearing was adjourned, and cloud was really starting to feel the pressure of waiting. He could stay still like a statue on stakeouts but this? No, cloud can't do this. 

“Cloud, my child come to me. Don't worry yourself too much.” Genesis's voice broke through his impatience, slowly cloud, plus his blue blanket came to genesis's side, who in effect wrapped the young man into his arms, draping his blanket over them both.   
“what's taking them so long to get back to us? To me? I need this to be over, then i can focus on getting better. To get these itchy stitching out and breath and laugh without fear. I can't handle this waiting!! Just get on with it for crying out loud!” At that moment, cloud was angry and pulling at his hair in aggravation, slowly began crying, however these tears were in frustration.   
“No stop cloud. Please don't, you're going to hurt yourself baby. It's alright. Cloud. It's alright.” Soon, genesis was able to calm him down and with well practiced movements, genesis eased himself to lay down taking cloud along with him. Once settled genesis began talking, trying to explain what was taking so long, at the very least try to ease cloud's understandable frustration.

“My child. By all accounts, alfie has an outstanding record. It's this incident that they have to use to determine if he deserves to be dishonourably discharged. They will also have to take in mind what you said. Baby, it's getting sorted, but for now, let us be grateful that you are here with us. Let that be enough for now, the answer will be given to you soon.   
Whether that was enough for cloud? Who knows. But for now, it calmed cloud down enough for him to relax with genesis. That is, until another question came to mind…..  
“Gen. I'm glad you're here, really. But why are you here? And not at work?”  
Kissing cloud's temple and cheek, genesis merely stated with mock authority “I'm not doing paperwork. End of discussion.” which caused cloud to go into hysterical laughter. Genesis was all too pleased with himself and merely watched and kept an eye on cloud and his nearly healed neck wound.

 

It was four hours until they heard from the hearing that's a decision has been made. And after all that fretting, cloud was now officially panicking.   
Currently he was pacing, kunsel who came by as the others had to leave to head to the board as official witnesses to SOLDIER, there role when the hearing began, was watching with amusement cloud walking back and forth, that is until cloud's movement's were making him dizzy.  
“Cloud!!! Hey sit down, you're gonna make me hurl. Chill ok? It's going to end now.”  
“Kunsel. This waiting is driving me nuts, i'm waiting, BEEN waiting. If they have made up their minds, why can't we go over there now? I mean we could walk there and they should be ready but still…what's taking them so long?”  
Grabbing cloud's hand, kunsel sat him down beside him, shrugged his shoulders and said “because they're a bunch of bureaucrats who like to be completely satisfied with their decisions made. They don't get that SOLDIERS are men of action, so they're checking things over again and making sure that the right and correct decision has been made. They could very well be destroying a career cloud, they need to be one hundred percent positive. That's all.”  
Reluctantly agreeing cloud sighed “Yeah, i know, it's just. Kunsel it needs to just be over, that's all.”  
Wrapping a comforting arm around his shoulders kunsel replied “It will be soon cloud. It'll be over soon.”

And with that, a knock was heard coming from the apartment's door, signalling the hearing is ready for him, sitting up both men went to the door and were surprisingly greeted by Alex as well as the designated driver for the court.   
“Alex. Hey why are you here? Oh kunsel meet Dr coband, my shrink.”  
“Hey. Nice to meet you”  
Smiling brightly alex responded “And it's nice to meet you too. Cloud I'm here because you need me to be. This will end your ordeal and you need all the support we can give you. That's all.”  
“Thank-you. I mean it. Although i feel bad for alfie, he doesn't have this.”  
“Oh don't fret, zack's with him. He understands that you don't blame him, but he's there for you both.” And with kunsel promising words that Alfie will have a shoulder to lean on, the trio made their way to the hearing to settle this. 

Once and for all. 

TBC


	25. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harsh truths in essence are facts you don't want to face

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good morning from the uk. It's with great sadness that i'm posting the final six chapters today. Instead of dragging this around I'm gonna post all in one day. 
> 
> I would like to thank all those who have seen and read this, i'm truly, truly humbled by the response to this.   
> I've been thesilentone and This has been "dread"  
> :)

Dread Part 25 

 

Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters, nor do I intend to profit from them . All rights belong to square Enix

“Firstly i would like to apologise for the delay in regards to this hearing, a lot of factors and accounts had to be put into consideration before we made our verdict. So without delay we shall finalise the hearing of mission 08-256 76543.”

Here it was, the moment cloud was finally having. It's nearly been a month, give or take since his mission to the Warehouse had been handed out, and yet it still felt like yesterday. Sitting beside each side of his own , both kunsel and alex had enveloped his hands with one of their own. That small token of support really did wonders for him, on the opposite side of the room, sephiroth, genesis, angeal and zack were sitting, although they were in their work clothes, they still looked respectable, as did the other SOLDIERS in attendance. Cloud opted for a shirt and suit trousers, no suit coat or tie this time around. Out of his proverbial vision, cloud saw alfie, he looked defeated sitting there but what brought a small smile onto cloud's face was the fact that zack was holding his hand, despite all the grief he was put through due to cloud's hospitalisation, zack still felt for the young man, and it shows. When alfie sat down beside them, he was surprised to see no hostility from the men, even more shocked as when zack took his hand in his own and rested them on his thigh. At Least no matter what happens today, alfie can say he had some support. And that made cloud feel good. 

“Firstly, before I begin, i would like to give my condolences to the men who died and those that are still recovering, I wish you a speedy recovery.” Cloud involuntarily flinched at that, it didn't go unnoticed by his boyfriends, luckily alex and kunsel were able to ride it out with him.   
“This mission. Regardless of precautions taken, had nonetheless failed to protect the men in the unit. Such blatant actions on all sides cannot be so easily forgotten. That being said, the blame for all of this doesn't necessarily fall onto one man's shoulders, more likely the blame falls on them all. The men in charge, whether timid or not outspoken failed to keep the unit alert at all times. I do believe however that the results of the unit were well above necessary for SOLDIER. Our point is this. Such missions like this one should not be handed out without at least time to simulate all parameters and disadvantages SOLDIERS may face. Though that line of thought won't work in reality, so what does that leave us with? Half assed decisions being made and unnecessary casualties and death on both sides. The actions from third class strife, while showing basic understanding of what a solid leader should be, doesn't change the fact that he couldn't separate friend to commander.” Sephiroth, who has a better line of sight without having to blatantly turn his head could see just how much damage those lines from the head judge did to him, even alfie was hit by that. Did that mean the hearing blames cloud for his actions?  
Even angeal and genesis were flabbergasted by the accusations the judge was throwing at the poor boy, even some of the SOLDIERS attending thought he was out of line, some went on that mission and none of them thought cloud was useless, quite the opposite in fact.   
“Please do not take my words as a slant on Mr strife or his actions, i was merely stating that if he were to be much harder on those he commanded, the respect earned by him would be more solid.   
In regards to third class renking, the fact remains that he decided on insubordination that day, while noble his actions and intentions were, if third class renking had listened to the orders given by third class strife the incidents that occurred wouldn't have been set in motion.  
Bearing this in mind, his actions did save in part the life of third class strife when he sustained a fatal wound, so with this in mind. Third class renking you will be on probation. So long as he can carry out his duty without argument, he can stay in SOLDIER, however Mr renking, one foot or even a hair out of place, we will not hesitate to dishonourably discharged you is that clear SOLDIER?” On shaky legs, alfie stood, with the help of zack who had his hand and stood with him and replied   
“Yes sir. Agreed this will never happen again sir.” And with a nod from the judge signalling he can sit back down, he did so, softly sobbing, zack and surprisingly genesis to, began to comfort him.   
“As for third class strife, you're actions out in the Warehouse proves that unquestionably you have the mindset to lead and take the lead when necessary. But you're resolve to be a strong leader was tested and sadly came back short. Please don't take this to heart as words of criticism of you or your actions. You left your position to confront third class renking, an act that put you directly into harm's way to ensure that the men, or in this instance, a man was protected in the absence of your own safety. I commend your actions of what you did then, but if in the future such a mess turns out to happen again and a friend is on the mission with you, try to separate the two and be a hard ass if necessary. To ensure that everyone comes back home safely. This review is officially over. Let's not go through this again anytime soon, and let us remember those that have past” And with those words, the nightmare was officially over.

Well for alfie anyway.   
Cloud, although aware of what was said, ultimately realised something he subconsciously knew. 

He was, in essence, to blame.

TBC


	26. Chapter 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All you need to know that maybe your consciousness was right is to have someone else say the exact same thing.

Dread Part 26 

Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters, nor do I intend to profit from them . All rights belong to square Enix

It took a while for cloud to process all of this, even still sitting on the same window sill in the same position as when he was told by angeal that alex was here, cloud was still trying and failing to bring himself back, all he did was re-play what the judge said over and over again in his head. Even alex couldn't get cloud back. Sadly she had to attend another appointment but she gave the others some advice on how to get cloud back and her number should they need her.   
And so here cloud sat alone and wondering if he even belonged in SOLDIER to begin with. 

“I'm worried about cloud, you're saw how he was back there. That bloody judge did nothing but rip cloud a new one. What does he know of combat Anyway? I'm mean REALLY?!!” Zack started off as soon as alex had left. He clearly wasn't happy and was not afraid to voice it.   
“Puppy. Sit down and stop yelling please”. With a raised hand, angeal guided the thoroughly pissed man to his side, knowing what he had to say next, zack wasn't going to like.   
“While i agree on what your saying, there is some truth to what the judge said. Although he could've phrased it better.”

Oh he was right. Zack DID NOT like That one bit.   
“ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!! ANGEAL, CLOUD DIDN'T DO ANYTHING WRONG!! NOTHING AT ALL!! WHY ARE YOU BLAMING HIM?!!”  
“Zack. We're not blaming cloud, however even i have to admit, cloud was soft when it came to renking.” oh that's not good, even sephiroth was agreeing with angeal and the judge.

That just left…..   
“Gen? Please don't tell me that…”  
“No puppy. But. I do think that…”  
“So i was right then. It REALLY Was my fault”.  
One word could sum up cloud's sudden appearance and realisation that he heard them. Heard EVERYTHING 

SHIT. 

“Cloud… it's… it's not.” Zack's frantic words were not helping his case in defending his case.   
“It's fine zack. Don't worry about it, I'm. I'm gonna go out, get some fresh air and clear my head. I'll be back later, i think .” And with a sad, watering eyes, cloud left. 

“CLOUD!!!!” “brilliant, great job you guys, you know, what you all said could've been kept to yourselves till oh i don't know? MAYBE LATER ON WHEN CLOUD WAS CLEAR HEADED TO HEAR it!! You don't realise how much damage you've done to his self esteem now. I can't believe you guys. I can't even be in the same ROOM as you. I'm gonna go get cloud.” And with tears down his face, zack hastily went after cloud.   
Leaving three first class SOLDIERS to immediately regret hurting an already hurt young man more and a puppy who needed above all else to know that they had all their backs. 

TBC


	27. Chapter 27

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Take a walk, a swim, anything that will keep you from lashing out on those that mean you no harm.

Dread Part 27 

Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters, nor do I intend to profit from them . All rights belong to square Enix

Rain.   
That's all there is at the moment, after barely making it out of angeal's apartment without having a panic attack, cloud found himself sitting outside in the pouring rain at the front of the shinra building. 

Deep down he knew. He knew that it was at a glance, his fault for not having the balls to act tough, to be tough and in essence, that caused the situation to happen. However, it's one thing to think it, much less to have said out loud to you, even worse when it comes from four men you wouldn't even hesitate to die for, and now? They were theoretically speaking, throwing him under the bus.

And that. THAT hurts you the most.   
So here he is, sorrow ridden, soaked to the bone and feeling guilty for everything that the judge and his lover's said and left unsaid also. He didn't know how long he was sitting there until he felt a hand on his shoulder and the lack of rain hitting him. In a daze, he lifted his head to see an umbrella over him and a concerned, familiar face in his sight. 

“Al.. Alex. Hi, why you out in the rain?”  
“Oh cloud. I'm supposed to ask you that. What's happened?”  
“I'm… I'm..”  
“Hey it's alright cloud. Just breathe”.   
Sure enough, cloud was having a mild panic attack, so quickly, alex pulled cloud into a hug, completely ignoring cloud's protest at getting her soaked. Discarding her umbrella, she held him and held him tight.   
“I. I guess that you're missing the sunshine now huh?”  
Laughing she replied “Nah. Rain is nature's shower.” “Cloud. What happened?”  
And before he could explain a real loud bellow caught the duo off guard.  
“CLOUD!!! Cloud, i'm so, so sorry about that. I should've stopped them quicker. I'm..”  
“Zack. It's fine. It's not your fault. Please don't apologise for it”.  
Sadly, zack nodded, made his approach and stood by the pair sitting in the rain.   
“let's get out of this weather, shall we?” alex broke through the obvious tension.   
“That's a great idea, let's head back to my apartment. Cloud?”  
“Yeah. Yeah ok.”  
And with tired steps, the three made their way to zack's apartment. 

Once inside, zack ordered the pair to make themselves at home while he gets towels for the pair as well as some of cloud's clothes from his previous night's over also making them some hot drinks.  
Both settled in, the only noises were  
being admitted by cloud's heavy breathing and his dying down sobs.   
“Cloud. Come here.” without even waiting for an answer, alex pulled cloud into a warm hug and sat with him until he was ready to tell her what happened.   
“Cloud. Kid I've got you some clothes, take a shower and change. I don't want you to catch a cold.”  
With a nod cloud up and left, leaving zack uncomfortable with alex watching everything that transpired between the two , now under normal circumstances those two can get along like a house on fire. But right now? It's just plain awkward. 

Alex, deciding that this ice needs to be broken. she'll do it herself. 

“Zack. What happened? When i last saw you all, you were all fine and now? Why has cloud taken few steps back when he was so on top of all of this? Zack please. Talk to me, i'm here to help, not just cloud but all of you.”  
Bouncing like a, well a puppy, zack made his way over with two cups of hot chocolate in hand and tried to explain without stepping over cloud in the process. 

“I was venting, you know? About the judge and what he said, and how he said it. And the others. The other's practically sang the judges praises. They all agreed, well to some extent that what he had said had a or i suppose, some merit of truth to it. And well….” Zack trailed off, unable to even get this, fiasco i supposed, out in the open.   
However, alex was able to fill in the blanks.   
“Cloud overhead them. Didn't he?”   
Sadly laughing, zack answered “Yeah. Yeah he heard them alright.” “Don't get me wrong, i'm by cloud's side one hundred percent, but even now, really, really thinking about it. I hate to say but. Shit, they may have a point. Not about cloud, he did absolutely nothing wrong but…”  
“So. You agree also.”  
“Cloud. No. No kid. I didn't mean that…” “Please. Don't. Don't say anymore.”  
Seeing just how quickly cloud was going to self destruct, alex took charged before both cloud and zack have a fight that maybe couldn't be fixed. 

“Ok. You both need to stop. Zack? Despite all of this, cloud is still recovering from the shooting and the hearing. That in mind, you need to back down. Cloud needs to be safe and cared for while he's recuperating. One safe haven has been taken from him by angeal, genesis and sephiroth. You're all he has to go to. Cloud, i'm sensing that you agree with all of what's been said?”

Shocked by this, all Zack could say is.   
“Cloud?”  
Sighing, cloud sat down beside zack, silently letting him know he wasn't angry with him, and zack took that, all of it and gathered a willing cloud in his arms, cradling his head to his chest and running fingers through his hair and planting feather light kisses upon his scalp. Alex, who merely watched, had an easy smile on her face, glad to see the relationship between the two was fine, no significant damage done. She sat back and waited patiently for cloud to respond to her question. 

“I've. I've been thinking about this ever since we left the hearing. And i. I can't help but think that maybe i was weak in regards to my order's. If perhaps i wasn't, maybe. Maybe alfie would've i don't know? Listen to me.”

“Cloud…”

“No zack. It's fine, it's just. I just wasn't expecting to hear it from anyone that's all. Just because I've been shot, doesn't mean i can't handle a conversation like this. I guess it threw me through a loop that it was said literally ten minutes when we got back.”  
Nodding in understanding, alex Spoke up. 

“Therein lies the problem. Not the conversation or topic. But rather the timing of it.”

“Shit. Cloud. I'm so, so sorry, we shouldn't of treated you as if you were fine china that needs to be wrapped in cotton wool. Forgive my stupidity?”  
Laughing softly cloud did. “Ok. But zack. I'm not angry at you all honesty. Just wasn't expecting it that's all.”  
Glad that this was taken care of, alex moved to another subject that was connected to this. 

“Zack. I understand your anger at the others. However. You really should let them know that you have cloud with you and that he's doing ok. Don't sugar coat it but don't be angry ok?”   
Reluctantly grabbing his phone, he made a call he didn't feel like taking, knowing however he knew he had to make it. 

Twenty minutes later, angeal, genesis and sephiroth were at zack's apartment. Angeal was surprisingly carrying cloud's blanket with him. Sensing that maybe cloud needs some comfort, he brought it just in case. Seeing it, cloud silently cried and that was all the excuse angeal needed to approach the young man and embrace him, glad he wasn't rejected. All the while, sephiroth and genesis were making their way across the room, completely aware of the looks zack was throwing at them. 

“Cloud. Kid, i'm sorry for our careless words. We never meant to undermine your capabilities or your actions. We were merely given our take on what was said. I'm truly sorry for any damage i have caused you.”

Shaking his head, cloud replied “I'm. I'm not mad at you. At any of you.”

Alex, knowing that cloud was in no state to reply took over from cloud. 

“It's been drawn to attention that you all are treating cloud as if he will break. Have my words about his strength fell onto deaf ears perhaps? Nonetheless, cloud himself has been thinking what was said ever since the journey back. Perhaps, if you were to discuss this with the man in question rather than gathering round a campfire, chatting away secretly-like , cloud wouldn't have felt the need to escape from you all. I can't stress enough the fact that cloud is technically still in recovery and doing all of this stupidity will only delay him. He's a grown man, he can decide whether or not he can handle this. Right now you need to talk and REALLY talk This out.” And with a stern look at zack to stop shooting daggers at the men's heads, alex made her leave. Hoping the men will talk it out. 

“My child. I'm sorry.” 

“Enough. No more apologies. I'm cold, tired and i don't feel so good. Just for tonight, let's just leave it be.”

Accepting this, sephiroth strided over and felt cloud's forehead, his touch immediately drew back when he felt how hot cloud was.   
“Cloud. You're burning up. Let's take you back to angeal's and get the doctor over.”   
Carefully picking cloud up, angeal passed him to a desperate looking genesis who cloud went to willingly and the group set of to angeal's. 

Hopeful that when they did speak. It would be all that was needed to end this once and for all. 

TBC


	28. Chapter 28

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sit it out. In the end that's all that can be done.

Dread Part 28 

Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters, nor do I intend to profit from them . All rights belong to square Enix

Sure enough, cloud had a fever. While not at all life threatening, it would hinder his recovery. So the doctor gave him some antibiotics, checked his sutures, reapplied an antiseptic and freshly dressed his wounds, saying proudly that in a two weeks they can be taken out. 

Stressing to the general not to put cloud into a situation that forced his need to go out into the pouring rain, he left. 

And with that, All of today's drama came to light. Presently cloud was sleeping away in genesis's arms, wrapped up in his blue blanket, cloud had seemed to finally let things go. They won't push him tonight, so for now they were good. 

That just left zack to deal with. 

Zack hadn't said a word to any of them. Although he knew he was a hypocrite for being angry at them when he himself kinda agreed on what's been said, however it didn't change the fact that they all but barrelled on cloud. And now? Well he's gonna act like a puppy who was put in a corner. 

“Zack. Pup, please come sit down. We need to discuss this. Not just for us but cloud also.”

Every fibre was telling zack not to, be stubborn and make a fuss. But This? This was angeal asking him. Despite all of this, he would never disobey him, or any of them really. So still sporting an unimpressed frown, zack made his way over, careful not to disturb cloud who zack smiled softly at his fetal position form on genesis, stroked ever so gently the hair out of his face and made his way over to angeal's and sephiroth's side. 

“Zack. We're sorry for all of this. It's truly wasn't our attention to cause any harm to cloud but also to you. We, although with careful consideration for cloud, nevertheless say words that could've been subtlety spoken. We agree to what alex had said. Cloud is strong, stronger than we give him credit for, that doesn't excuse the actions we have caused. So we apologise zack. We are sorry”.

Zack, although still kinda pissed, finally relented, to some extent anyways. 

“It's really not for me to forgive here. I, ashamedly admit that even i gave what was said some thought. The only difference is that I said it to cloud, although he snuck up on me also. The fact remains that i said it gently, no “as a matter of fact” bullshit tone used, i didn't doubt him. Never. That was all on you guys. Not me.”

Sephiroth, ever the analysis that he was took over from angeal. 

“So. If we were to discuss this matter, in all the delicatesy it deserves, cloud wouldn't object to us, in a sense to cross examining him. Do you think?”  
Sadly laughing at that, zack pulls sephiroth hand closer to him, entwining their fingers he finished his conversation off. 

“Seph. He doesn't need to be treated with kid gloves. He's not made of glass. He was shot in his neck not two weeks ago and look at him? We all need to respect him. More than we already do.   
And with a calculated nod, the general sat back and waited for cloud to awake so they can give him the apologies he deserves and none of the pity he thinks they have for him. 

It was close to nine pm by the time cloud woke up. Upon gaining his senses, cloud realised that he was no longer on genesis but sephiroth instead. 

“Cloud. Young man, I apologise for assuming that you were unable to have such a conversation with us. I was so intent on making absolutely sure that your recovery went smoothly. Never realising that in inadvertently ignoring what was said, we were doling out damage to you. With utmost humility, i ask for your forgiveness. And know that it will never happen again.” 

All so suddenly, cloud jumps into his lap, clearly surprised and definitely wasn't expecting this, sephiroth, with caution placed his arms around cloud.   
Clearly finding this funny, cloud pulled back a bit and spoke. 

“Seph. It's fine. Honestly. I'm not happy with this, but i'm far from perfect either. I do in a way of what was said to me in the hearing, i’m not happy it was announced like that. But i do admit fault on my behalf.” “Seph? What's wrong, why do you look annoyed?”

Indeed the general did, however it was with reason. 

“Cloud. The blame is not nor shall ever be on you. Your actions alone saved renking's life, an act that put you directly into harm's way. I've never been more proud of you then when that happened. Please do not mistake the judge's words as a slant on you. You did the best under extreme circumstances and survived, and for that i'm grateful to you.”

Slowly crying, cloud murmured Thank-yous to the general who merely waved them away and pulled him back into his arms. 

Standing in the doorway, angeal, genesis and zack watched on. Knowing that while they all cloud an apology. Seeing and hearing cloud say that it's fine was enough for now to let this matter go. 

And for that. They were truly grateful. 

TBC


	29. Chapter 29

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's time to let go of all the suffering that has been inflicted on you.

Dread Part 29 

Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters, nor do I intend to profit from them . All rights belong to square Enix

 

“Ok. Hold still. Almost done. Got it. There you go cloud, they're all out.”

Finally. It's been upto a month since the shooting and cloud can finally breathe without fear of his neck ripping open all over again. 

While still on sick leave, at least for another month or so, right now cloud was happy. Happy that all of this was Finally, FINALLY over. 

“Now then cloud. While the sutures are gone, that scar will still be tender. Until the mako in your body takes care of it, please retract from moving your head in a vigorous way. Your movements should be paced, not too gentle but not firm either. Moderate between the two and relax when you feel a pulling sensation underneath, if so apply a hot compress to the area and let the heat relax the muscles and tendons.”

And with a solid, grateful handshake and smile that was reciprocated, cloud left. 

“I'm back!” It took two hours to see the doctor and an additional thirty minutes to return to angeal's. And judging by the scowl on genesis's face, he clearly was expecting cloud back a lot sooner than now.   
“Cloud, my child, WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG?!??!”

Laughing softly at the drama that is genesis rhapsodos, cloud headed over, jumping into his lap and proceeded to litter genesis's face with kisses. 

“Sorry! Sorry, i bumped into both alex and alfie. We just got caught up in the conversation i didn't realise how much time had passed. Forgive me?”  
Mocking his disgust at being left alone waiting, genesis made a show of forgiving cloud. 

“Well as long as that is the case, i will let you off…. For now anyways”. And with a giggle from cloud, both locked lips with the other. 

Seemingly breaking up for air, genesis wondered something else. 

“How is alfie doing? Is he keeping his nose clean?”  
Snuggling into genesis's neck, tracing his pulse and kissing the strongest point of it cloud murmured back.   
“Hmm. Alfie's great, we're planning to meet each other soon. But yeah he's good, he's got his wits about him and is doing well. I'm glad he made it through all of this. Thank-you also gen. Thank-you for apologising to him too.” pulling cloud back, genesis can see what his apology meant to him but also for alfie also. 

Two days ago, upon finishing off paperwork, genesis bumped into alfie in the hallway. Although shying away, alfie nonetheless stood at attention and gave genesis a respectful greeting. Well what was genesis supposed to do with that?

Simple. He apologised for his behaviour on the phone, while not apologising for the words spoken, he was sorry for how they were. And alfie took it with good grace. The pair both parted on mutual understanding and sincerely hoped to work with the other soon. 

“Well. It's only fair. I'm not happy about the shooting or everything that happened as a result of it. But he seemed to genuinely want to make amends of all that happened, if he continues the path he's on, he will turn into a upstanding young man and a fine SOLDIER too.   
Although….” at that, genesis let the words linger. Cloud, who Wanted to know why he stopped, had cocked an eyebrow and waited for genesis to continue.   
However when he saw a mischievous look on his face, well cloud started to regret being that curious.”

“Uh gen? “although what”  
Smirking, genesis responded in a sultry voice   
“although, he will never be as great as you my child”.

And with a laugh from both, they proceeded to make out some more. 

It was close to ten in the evening when the others returned home.   
Genesis, Although tired from his Missions and paperwork, made sure that his was awake and waiting for their return.   
“Good evening my good sirs. And how has shinra treated you today?”  
Snorting at genesis, zack made his way over and plopped himself onto his lap.

“Why good sir. It treated me well. As for those two? You'll have to ask themselves”. And with a smile from genesis, the pair kissed, albeit softly.   
Breaking apart, zack realised something while angeal and sephiroth greeted genesis in the same manner. 

“Hey gen. Where's cloud? Is he back yet?”

Easing away from sephiroth, genesis turned to look at the puppy.   
“He's asleep in the bedroom. It's been a long day for him. He complained about his neck earlier, not used to it being free from the dressings, i advised him to go rest, so he's doing so now.” 

Nodding in understanding, zack went to check on him, however not before angeal pulled him closer to him. 

“Zack. Let the kid rest. We've all had a tough day, physically, cloud still needs to adjust to the sensation of his neck being free from the dressings that have held his neck up. He needs time to get used to it being unrestricted. You'll see him soon.”

With reluctance, zack agreed. It's hard to believe that all of this happened nearly over a month ago. Cloud had improved so, so much, it's easy to forget that if any more trauma should occur, regardless of the nature of it, cloud could unintentionally reopen the wound up all over again. So for now, rest means REST.

So for now, puppies mustn't jump around so much, lest he causes disasters to happen. 

Silently getting up to prepare dinner for the group, sephiroth walked over to cloud's room and silently entered.   
Upon seeing cloud asleep, he walked over, leant over him and proceeded to gently place a kiss to his forehead and murmured. “Good night my young one. May you have a comforting rest filled with peace. 

And with that, sephiroth took his leave.  
Finally, everything has come to pass. 

TBC


	30. Chapter 30

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is how it ends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here's the finale. Not much I can say that I've haven't already. Hope you have enjoyed the ride.
> 
> I will return, in this fandom and others, so look out for more stories from me, if you want to,that is.   
> Merry Christmas/ happy holidays, which ever you celebrate and have a wonderful, safe and joyous new year!!!!! :)

Dread Part 30 

Full disclaimer applies. I do not own find final fantasy vii , it's world nor the characters, nor do I intend to profit from them . All rights belong to square Enix

Epilogue. 

“All right men. Today we will be observing the inside and outside of the Warehouse. Using only necessary movements and engaging only when necessary , get to point A to point B. You have thirty minutes starting now!!”

It's been six months since the shooting had happened and cloud was doing great. 

A lot of things have happened to him as well as the others. Cloud was a newly appointed second class SOLDIER. He and alfie both were in fact, at the moment they were conducting a training programme in the event of something like that happening again as it did to the pair. 

Sephiroth decided that the new generation of SOLDIERS should learn that even the best laid strategies could lead to failure and casualties. And so this mandatory test to all new SOLDIERS was spawned, with cloud and alfie in charge every time this exercise was taking place . It's not meant to be completed or even lead to a successful outcome. It's meant to test how the SOLDIER'S would react or what to do in this situation in order to see how they would handle this kind of situation where anything can happen. 

And what perfect people to put in charge and oversee as well as lead this exercise than two SOLDIERS who have been through this?

“Hey you two. How's it going?”  
Zack approached, spawning his own first class uniform. Yep, that's right. They promoted the puppy. 

“Hi sir. It's going well. They have just entered the Warehouse now. They should encounter the first obstacle shortly and should be finished by six.” Alfie pipped in. 

Cloud, was currently too engrossed in watching the camera feeds seeing how the new recruits are doing to really pay any attention to the goings-on around him. Seeing this, zack laughed softly and made his way over to him, sliding a warm arm around his shoulders, he spoke. 

“Babe. Whatcha doing? Spying on the new SOLDIER'S? Ready to rip them a new one should you need to?”

Snorting cloud replied “Hardly. I'm just curious as to how their doing. I thought maybe they might be using unorthodox methods in their movements and battle strategies. So far, nothing exciting is happening. Zack. Why are you here and not working? Has genesis rubbed off on you?”

Laughing and in the process scaring the other observers, zack countered.  
“Well. Kinda, there's nothing pressing that needs to be attended to yet . So i'm just seeing how you crazy kids are doing”.

Relaxing into zack's embrace, cloud merely grunted in agreement.   
“We're good zack. We still on for tonight?”

Kissing cloud's temple he let's go reluctantly and responded.   
“Yep. Are you taking care of your neck? Let me see.”

Tilting cloud's head back to the side gently, zack can just about make out the scar. 

Although the mako did it's job, cloud still feels the pulling sensation he was told to look out for. He made an appointment to see the doctor, it turns out he's suffering from phantom pains and they will fade in time. However, the doctor stressed that he should keep an eye on the duration of the feeling in case of nerve damage, in that event he may need surgery to resolve the issue. At the moment however, it seems to be on the mend. 

“It's not too bad right now, it slightly aches, though i think that maybe due to the positions i'm in. Don't worry, i am relaxing the muscles in my neck and taking breaks if it's too much.” Cloud said reassuring zack, he turned to smile and give him a kiss, well aware of the situation they are in, as well as the onlookers present. 

“I know. Just being sure that's all.”  
At that moment, alfie piped back in.

“Don't worry sir. I'm keeping an eye on cloud. If it's too much, i’ll send him to the doctor and notify you all.”

Zack acknowledged alfie with a smile of gratitude and said his goodbyes. Hoping though doubting, cloud will take it easy. 

 

“I told you cloud. Why didn't you listen to me, Hmm?” it was eight in the evening and cloud, as predicted by zack, had indeed overdo himself and that resulted in cloud laying on the couch with a hot compress to his neck. Though using a mild form of his authority, zack was although scolding him, was actually worried about cloud. 

“I'm fine zack. stop fretting. You're going to give yourself heart failure.” Cloud tried to joke. 

And it worked…...Until he laughed which caused cloud to flinched and winced when he jarred his neck muscles. 

“Cloud. Easy there, relax cloud. I'll call the doctor.”  
“Zackkk… don't”. But it was too late, zack had his phone to his ear, giving cloud a stern look to be still and relax. He really had no chance of winning this fight.

It was close to quarter past eight when angeal came home. As usual, he greeted the pair with the utmost politeness he could give them. Considering he's been on his feet near enough all day, he did surprisingly well. 

“Evening you two. Cloud? What happened to you? Are you alright?” Seeing cloud curled up on the couch with his ever present blue blanket,   
Angeal inquired, but before cloud could reassure the man zack made his opinion of this known. 

“No he's not. He overdid himself and this is the Result of it. Yes hi I'm still here”  
Angeal, clearly not happy about this, was nonetheless more understanding to cloud than zack seemed to be. 

“Cloud. You okay kid? Let me have me have a look.” Easing away the compress, angeal tenderly massage his neck. Breaking down any muscle tension he found.   
“Right. The doctor will be here soon. Cloud, you've got to learn to pace yourself.”

Clearly not impressed by zack's words, angeal snorted, and gave the puppy a look that can peel paint and spoke. 

“Zack. Considering that you push yourself to the extent of collapsing on a daily basis, i don't believe you're in any position to lecture cloud on pacing himself.”

Still on the phone, zack merely poked his tongue out and carried onto his second conversation over the phone. 

“Yeah. Great. Yep. Ok, ok thanks.”  
“Ok. Seph and gen will be home later.  
How's he looking angeal?”

With a slight frown on his face, angeal turned around and faced zack, all the while smoothing back cloud's hair repeatingly.   
“He's... I think, cloud has pulled a muscle. It shouldn't be a problem as long as cloud relaxes and is not harassed by you zack. He'll be ok.”

True enough, cloud did indeed pull a muscle, after administering a muscle relaxing agent, all cloud can do is rest and use a hot compress until the drug takes effect. 

It was around nine thirty in the evening when sephiroth and genesis came home and immediately became mother hens to rival that of angeal. 

“My child. Are you alright?” At that, all cloud could do was roll his eyes at the pair and relax. Sephiroth, clearly amused by cloud's attitude simply made his way over and said hello to cloud and gave him a kiss. Genesis soon followed suit and the gang settled in for the night. 

Later on in the evening, once all was said and done,with all grabbing dinner and enjoying the company their with. One word could sum up the evening. 

Joyful. 

The End.


End file.
